“Guilt is the worst feeling in the world”

word

Lebih lebih pulak

I started a new blog.

http://trashworthspeaking.blogspot.com/

I’m not deleting this one, though, Stick around and you’ll see the difference between the two blogs.

If it burns, stay away

 

(image from  http://browse.deviantart.com/photography/?q=fire&order=9&offset=24&offset=24#/dqf1vo)

Fire, when you touch it, it burns. But only if you touch it for more than a second. When you pull your finger from the fire, there will be black soot. But only if you touch it for more than a second.

If you play with fire, you’ll get the effects.
And playing with fire for more than a second and for more than once, is an idiotic move that could cripple you.

You can’t really control fire. You can touch it, though you could never hold it in your hands. You could try to extinguish it, but you could never stop it from spreading before you do. You could start a fire, but after that, it’s not under your control anymore. You’ll be under it’s control.

And then you’ll regret your idiocy.

But when that happens, it’s already too late. Never play with fire, little ones. We used to hear that all the time when we were kids. Maybe not necessarily in that sentence, but still, we get that meaning from the older and wiser ones. But we still go against still.

We still play with fire, lose our control, be it’s slave, and regret. And we’ll do it again and again. When I put it that way, it doesn’t really make sense now does it?

Learn to regret and stay away. Before you cripple yourself.

Mahu berpuisi

Apabila rasa hati sedikit menyimpang, pasti rasa berat dan reput bergelumang. Apabila rindu mula bersuara, pasti nostalgia melimpah di dada. Apabila terasa jauh berbatu, mahu ku jerit, mahu ku seru. Apabila kau kecil ku genggam kau telus, ku bisik namamu sehingga ku haus. Apabila kata-katamu tidak menyapa, ku tak tenteram jiwa tak kena. Apabila saat merangkak tidak berbunyi, aku tunggu kau, ku tunggu sendiri.

I Miss You.

Mak benci tau

Sebab kadang-kadang tu kan aku macam mahu sepak bahu orang yang kadang-kadang deserve sepakan di bahu tu kan.

Tapi aku tak sampai kalau nak sepak bahu dia. Kalau dia duduk atas lantai boleh lah kot.

Tapi kalau duduk atas kerusi pon tak sampai.

Bak kata Muizz, I am ‘undertall’. Bukan short ye tuantuanpuanpuan.

Sebab ape kau nak tau tak? Eh, kenapa aku suka start ayat dengan sebab ah? Sebab la, because la, ape la, ape la, ape la.

Okay. Sebab apa kau nak tau tak? Sebab orang macam ni kan lagi best kalau duduk dalam gua. Senang sikit. Boleh carik pasal dengan kelawar ke, taik kelawar ke, batu ke, Bigfoot ke kan? Sebab kalau dia tak dok dalam gua dia carik pasal dengan manusia. Dan bila dia carik pasal dengan manusia dia mendorong manusia tu rasa nak sepak bahu dia walaupun manusia tersebut ‘undertall’.

Dalam kes ini sayalah manusia tersebot.

Sebab kan, orang jenis macam ni kan, kan kan kan, kan, sewajarnye di duct-tape kat mulut nya supaya tidak terkeluar lazer-lazeran sekalian alam. Kalau beli insuran pon insuran tak berani nak cover tau. Mulut macam sampah uols tau taaak. Benci mak.

Tapi kan. Tapi kan kan kan. Kalau kita mengata dia dia sedih gilaaaaa. Siap guling-guling atas katil menangis panggil Mamiiii mamiiiii orang kena buliiii!!! Mamee Monster pon tak nak tolong kau tau tak. Eiiiii tumbuk tau la.

Aku memang menyampah tengok orang kutuk-kutuk orang kat Facebook ni, macam tak reti letak nama. Takot le tu. Tapi aku pon tak letak nama. Hahahahahahahaha cool kan?

Sometimes you just want something so bad

Like lasagna.

Maybe it was my room mate’s fault for tapau-ing some seafood lasagna from Pizza Hut last night. I’ve been thinking about lasagna ever since I woke up.

Basically, this was the conversation I had with myself throughout the day:

Upon waking up
I’m gonna have lasagna for lunch. Yum.

Upon waiting for class to start
After class I’m gonna go to Pizza Hut and tapau some lasagna.

Upon semi-hearing the lecturer’s lecture
OMG I CAN’T WAIT FOR LASAGNA! Suruh Afiq hantarkan la kalau dia boleh.

Upon eating nasi lemak for breakfast
Damn I had nasi lemak. Now I’m full. Nevermind, it’s only 10.30am. I can have lasagna for late lunch. Gonna call Afiq later.

Upon waiting for the bus to reach Mawar
Waaa Afiq can’t tapau for me! Ah, I’m gonna walk to 7 on my own to get lasagna!

Upon reaching Mawar
Seems too troublesome to walk to 7 alone to get lasagna. Maybe I’ll go in the evening. So I can have dinner inside the room while studying.

Upon reaching the room until now
NAK LASAGNA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You Never Know Until You Let Go

I don’t want to know so I’m not letting go.

He can be annoying, hard-headed, loud, weird, and sometimes, ironically, too sensible. He doesn’t give me flowers every time we see each other, nor does he randomly buys me chocolate. Nope, he doesn’t open the door for me, and he doesn’t take off his jacket and lay it in a puddle so I can cross without getting my shoes wet. He doesn’t always holds my shopping bags, and no he does not tell me how wonderful I look each time we meet.

No.

And I don’t know if we’d still be with each other if he does all the things mentioned above.

The thing is, girls, those things are too good to be true. They only happen in movies, and novels. In both cases, things are bound to go wrong in the storyline, one way or another. And did you ever think of why do the writers get paid so much? It’s either because they are smart enough to think of ‘romantic gestures’ as stated above, or they are cool enough to get away with cliches. Either way, it doesn’t really happen in real life.

Even if it does, it isn’t true.
True here means in the sense of originality, not honesty. Yes, your boyfriend can be honest to his heart if he brings you chocolate every day. But he isn’t being true in a sense of doing something original.

It’s cliche, girls.

Well, we can dream. And dreams aren’t bad at all. We so can dream Johnny Depp proposing to us on a cruise ship while being shirtless (oh dayum). We can. But that’s fiction for you.

Do not complain if he doesn’t do all of these cliches. Because, to me, that’s his natural self. Maybe he has his own way of telling you he loves you without copying something from the movies.

Maybe something like knowing that you don’t like cucumbers and tomatoes thus he eats them from your sandwich before giving it to you. Or maybe the way he humours you by winking at you knowing you’ll giggle like a little girl even though you’ve been with him for quite some time. Or the way he entertains you by using chop sticks even though baby, you’re better off with forks. Or simple things like maybe, maybe, still wanting to see you even if he had a rough day, and still apologized for being late even if it’s not his fault.

That’s his own way of being your very own proposing shirtless Johnny Depp.
And  you’re smart enough to realize that you mean to him that much.

So girls, don’t complain. Just don’t.

Just love him.

Okay?

Social networking websites

I have been on Freindster soooommmeeetime ago. But have never liked it. Kira tak penah melekat la dengan Friendster. A week after I set it up tros lupa. Haha.

And then came the glorious Myspace area. Ingat lagi. Selalu cari orang nak comment. Tengah batak nak ada collection comment yang sangat banyak kan. Biasa lah, budak-budak lagi. Hehehehe. Dekat Myspace lama jugak la. Because it was sooooooooo much cooler than Friendster. Tak lambat. Tak leceh. Can send bling-bling html thingies that slows down your friend’s page. Up to a point, I got bored. So I deleted all the ‘friends’ yang tak kenal, and I even deleted all the comments. Kindoff stupid actually. Semangat nak belas-belas ribu comment, then delete semua. Took me a few hours to delete each one of them.

Then came Facebook. A more sophisticated website that’s a bit mature. Long gone were the days which I added and approved strangers. Now it’s strictly reatives, personal friends and friends-of-friends only. Friends-of-friends-of-friends tamau.

This is when Myspace became the thing of the past. Though my Myspace account still exists, I haven’t logged into it for a loooooonnnggg time. But I just don’t see the point of deleting it. So let it be.

And I’m still sticking to Facebookyeay!! As for Twitter and Flickr, no, I have neither. And I thought I could get away with Formspring too, since I don’t want to be a tech whore. But It’s sooo cool maaannnn.

So yes, tujuan post ini adalah untuk mempromosi Formspring saya yang baru buat tadi. Silakan!!!!

http://www.formspring.me/MayaZhrdn

Lakan-lakan

    

With the right people, life won’t be so hard. I love my roommates RoseFatenTipah+Nina!

Though I’m still trying to fit in with the classmates.
I don’t have anything against them. Nonononono. No wahahahaayyy. It’s just that I feel that I don’t fit in. Don’t ask me why.

So yeah, here’s a toast to my roommates+Nina! *drinks air kosong*

An Island

Sometimes what you see isn’t everything.

Sometimes you could see someone having the whole world as their friends but they could still feel so alone. Sometimes you could see someone who seem so alone yet he or she may be content with life just the way it is.

I’m neither.

I don’t have a certain circle I hang out with. Nor do I hang out with everyone.

Sometimes I feel so content, and yet I feel so alone most of the time. Maybe it’s my fault, for not approaching people. Maybe it’s just not the way I am. Maybe I’m not bothered to. Maybe I’m just weird.

Maybe people don’t like me because I keep disappearing into my books and music. And I talk to cats.

Sometimes I just hate me.