this ain't no memoir

2010-07-18T12:36:00.001+08:00

“Guilt is the worst feeling in the world”

word

Lebih lebih pulak

2010-07-17T19:52:00.001+08:00

I started a new blog.

http://trashworthspeaking.blogspot.com/

I’m not deleting this one, though, Stick around and you’ll see the difference between the two blogs.

If it burns, stay away

2010-07-17T11:35:00.001+08:00

(image from http://browse.deviantart.com/photography/?q=fire&order=9&offset=24&offset=24#/dqf1vo)

Fire, when you touch it, it burns. But only if you touch it for more than a second. When you pull your finger from the fire, there will be black soot. But only if you touch it for more than a second.

If you play with fire, you’ll get the effects.
And playing with fire for more than a second and for more than once, is an idiotic move that could cripple you.

You can’t really control fire. You can touch it, though you could never hold it in your hands. You could try to extinguish it, but you could never stop it from spreading before you do. You could start a fire, but after that, it’s not under your control anymore. You’ll be under it’s control.

And then you’ll regret your idiocy.

But when that happens, it’s already too late. Never play with fire, little ones. We used to hear that all the time when we were kids. Maybe not necessarily in that sentence, but still, we get that meaning from the older and wiser ones. But we still go against still.

We still play with fire, lose our control, be it’s slave, and regret. And we’ll do it again and again. When I put it that way, it doesn’t really make sense now does it?

Learn to regret and stay away. Before you cripple yourself.

Mahu berpuisi

2010-07-17T01:42:00.001+08:00

Apabila rasa hati sedikit menyimpang, pasti rasa berat dan reput bergelumang. Apabila rindu mula bersuara, pasti nostalgia melimpah di dada. Apabila terasa jauh berbatu, mahu ku jerit, mahu ku seru. Apabila kau kecil ku genggam kau telus, ku bisik namamu sehingga ku haus. Apabila kata-katamu tidak menyapa, ku tak tenteram jiwa tak kena. Apabila saat merangkak tidak berbunyi, aku tunggu kau, ku tunggu sendiri.

I Miss You.

Mak benci tau

2010-07-09T15:21:00.001+08:00

Sebab kadang-kadang tu kan aku macam mahu sepak bahu orang yang kadang-kadang deserve sepakan di bahu tu kan.

Tapi aku tak sampai kalau nak sepak bahu dia. Kalau dia duduk atas lantai boleh lah kot.

Tapi kalau duduk atas kerusi pon tak sampai.

Bak kata Muizz, I am ‘undertall’. Bukan short ye tuantuanpuanpuan.

Sebab ape kau nak tau tak? Eh, kenapa aku suka start ayat dengan sebab ah? Sebab la, because la, ape la, ape la, ape la.

Okay. Sebab apa kau nak tau tak? Sebab orang macam ni kan lagi best kalau duduk dalam gua. Senang sikit. Boleh carik pasal dengan kelawar ke, taik kelawar ke, batu ke, Bigfoot ke kan? Sebab kalau dia tak dok dalam gua dia carik pasal dengan manusia. Dan bila dia carik pasal dengan manusia dia mendorong manusia tu rasa nak sepak bahu dia walaupun manusia tersebut ‘undertall’.

Dalam kes ini sayalah manusia tersebot.

Sebab kan, orang jenis macam ni kan, kan kan kan, kan, sewajarnye di duct-tape kat mulut nya supaya tidak terkeluar lazer-lazeran sekalian alam. Kalau beli insuran pon insuran tak berani nak cover tau. Mulut macam sampah uols tau taaak. Benci mak.

Tapi kan. Tapi kan kan kan. Kalau kita mengata dia dia sedih gilaaaaa. Siap guling-guling atas katil menangis panggil Mamiiii mamiiiii orang kena buliiii!!! Mamee Monster pon tak nak tolong kau tau tak. Eiiiii tumbuk tau la.

Aku memang menyampah tengok orang kutuk-kutuk orang kat Facebook ni, macam tak reti letak nama. Takot le tu. Tapi aku pon tak letak nama. Hahahahahahahaha cool kan?

Sometimes you just want something so bad

2010-06-29T18:12:00.001+08:00

Like lasagna.

Maybe it was my room mate’s fault for tapau-ing some seafood lasagna from Pizza Hut last night. I’ve been thinking about lasagna ever since I woke up.

Basically, this was the conversation I had with myself throughout the day:

Upon waking up
I’m gonna have lasagna for lunch. Yum.

Upon waiting for class to start
After class I’m gonna go to Pizza Hut and tapau some lasagna.

Upon semi-hearing the lecturer’s lecture
OMG I CAN’T WAIT FOR LASAGNA! Suruh Afiq hantarkan la kalau dia boleh.

Upon eating nasi lemak for breakfast
Damn I had nasi lemak. Now I’m full. Nevermind, it’s only 10.30am. I can have lasagna for late lunch. Gonna call Afiq later.

Upon waiting for the bus to reach Mawar
Waaa Afiq can’t tapau for me! Ah, I’m gonna walk to 7 on my own to get lasagna!

Upon reaching Mawar
Seems too troublesome to walk to 7 alone to get lasagna. Maybe I’ll go in the evening. So I can have dinner inside the room while studying.

Upon reaching the room until now
NAK LASAGNA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You Never Know Until You Let Go

2010-06-25T21:19:00.001+08:00

I don’t want to know so I’m not letting go.

He can be annoying, hard-headed, loud, weird, and sometimes, ironically, too sensible. He doesn’t give me flowers every time we see each other, nor does he randomly buys me chocolate. Nope, he doesn’t open the door for me, and he doesn’t take off his jacket and lay it in a puddle so I can cross without getting my shoes wet. He doesn’t always holds my shopping bags, and no he does not tell me how wonderful I look each time we meet.

No.

And I don’t know if we’d still be with each other if he does all the things mentioned above.

The thing is, girls, those things are too good to be true. They only happen in movies, and novels. In both cases, things are bound to go wrong in the storyline, one way or another. And did you ever think of why do the writers get paid so much? It’s either because they are smart enough to think of ‘romantic gestures’ as stated above, or they are cool enough to get away with cliches. Either way, it doesn’t really happen in real life.

Even if it does, it isn’t true.
True here means in the sense of originality, not honesty. Yes, your boyfriend can be honest to his heart if he brings you chocolate every day. But he isn’t being true in a sense of doing something original.

It’s cliche, girls.

Well, we can dream. And dreams aren’t bad at all. We so can dream Johnny Depp proposing to us on a cruise ship while being shirtless (oh dayum). We can. But that’s fiction for you.

Do not complain if he doesn’t do all of these cliches. Because, to me, that’s his natural self. Maybe he has his own way of telling you he loves you without copying something from the movies.

Maybe something like knowing that you don’t like cucumbers and tomatoes thus he eats them from your sandwich before giving it to you. Or maybe the way he humours you by winking at you knowing you’ll giggle like a little girl even though you’ve been with him for quite some time. Or the way he entertains you by using chop sticks even though baby, you’re better off with forks. Or simple things like maybe, maybe, still wanting to see you even if he had a rough day, and still apologized for being late even if it’s not his fault.

That’s his own way of being your very own proposing shirtless Johnny Depp.
And you’re smart enough to realize that you mean to him that much.

So girls, don’t complain. Just don’t.

Just love him.

Okay?

Social networking websites

2010-06-18T23:44:00.001+08:00

I have been on Freindster soooommmeeetime ago. But have never liked it. Kira tak penah melekat la dengan Friendster. A week after I set it up tros lupa. Haha.

And then came the glorious Myspace area. Ingat lagi. Selalu cari orang nak comment. Tengah batak nak ada collection comment yang sangat banyak kan. Biasa lah, budak-budak lagi. Hehehehe. Dekat Myspace lama jugak la. Because it was sooooooooo much cooler than Friendster. Tak lambat. Tak leceh. Can send bling-bling html thingies that slows down your friend’s page. Up to a point, I got bored. So I deleted all the ‘friends’ yang tak kenal, and I even deleted all the comments. Kindoff stupid actually. Semangat nak belas-belas ribu comment, then delete semua. Took me a few hours to delete each one of them.

Then came Facebook. A more sophisticated website that’s a bit mature. Long gone were the days which I added and approved strangers. Now it’s strictly reatives, personal friends and friends-of-friends only. Friends-of-friends-of-friends tamau.

This is when Myspace became the thing of the past. Though my Myspace account still exists, I haven’t logged into it for a loooooonnnggg time. But I just don’t see the point of deleting it. So let it be.

And I’m still sticking to Facebookyeay!! As for Twitter and Flickr, no, I have neither. And I thought I could get away with Formspring too, since I don’t want to be a tech whore. But It’s sooo cool maaannnn.

So yes, tujuan post ini adalah untuk mempromosi Formspring saya yang baru buat tadi. Silakan!!!!

http://www.formspring.me/MayaZhrdn

Lakan-lakan

2010-06-17T22:29:00.001+08:00

With the right people, life won’t be so hard. I love my roommates RoseFatenTipah+Nina!

Though I’m still trying to fit in with the classmates.
I don’t have anything against them. Nonononono. No wahahahaayyy. It’s just that I feel that I don’t fit in. Don’t ask me why.

So yeah, here’s a toast to my roommates+Nina! *drinks air kosong*

An Island

2010-06-16T23:19:00.001+08:00

Sometimes what you see isn’t everything.

Sometimes you could see someone having the whole world as their friends but they could still feel so alone. Sometimes you could see someone who seem so alone yet he or she may be content with life just the way it is.

I’m neither.

I don’t have a certain circle I hang out with. Nor do I hang out with everyone.

Sometimes I feel so content, and yet I feel so alone most of the time. Maybe it’s my fault, for not approaching people. Maybe it’s just not the way I am. Maybe I’m not bothered to. Maybe I’m just weird.

Maybe people don’t like me because I keep disappearing into my books and music. And I talk to cats.

Sometimes I just hate me.

Pointless yet again

2010-06-14T17:12:00.001+08:00

I am loving my new look. It’s simple, sophisticated, serious, yet very chic. Not as lame as boring as my old one, but isn’t too overly done. It’s juuuusstt nice, as my niece would say it. Eventhough I had nothing to do with it, all compliments go to the creator of the new look.

Anyways, no. I am not talking about a new hair cut or change of clothing style. I am talking about my blogger template.

Maybe, just maybe, it could motivate me to blog more often. I mean, like I used to. I keep complaining that I have nothing to blog about padahal ada banyak gila. It’s just that I don’t want to write about boring things, so I wait for interesting things to happen but I still won’t write about them so I ended up writing something more boring than ever. Something like this.

I am still waiting for an inspiration.

*sigh*

Maya to planet Earth

2010-06-10T20:37:00.003+08:00

When you need it the most, it goes away.

This applies to concentration. I can't seem to finish my video assignment. (Alah, self-introductory video je pon. Bukan nye shooting V for Vendetta).

Weird thing is, right, I was in full-swing, up and ready to go, come on baby let's finish this shit, ain't no one gonna mess with me cz I'm so determined biatch mood everytime there's a gap between classes, and I'm stuck at Intec, without my laptop.

Life is ironic. Or you make it that because you need to cover your banyak-alasan ass.

But come on, seriously. I need inspiration. I just can't get on movie maker and lalala pop! there you go a perfect video of me! yeayyyy!!!!!! No, people, that is just not possible. at all. no way. Besides, I'm Maya, of course I need to make something really cooooo-ellllll and sooo-hhooo-hooooo differentoz from the others.

Right. I'll be better off singing a lullaby to the lecturer and classmates. They'll have better sleep that way.

Some people are born as procrastinators. Damn. Took me 6 spell checks to spell that.

Well, anyhoo.
I'm going to take a shower in the stinky public shower-room

Euw.

Gen Y

2010-06-09T19:12:00.002+08:00

I am having a conversation on Facebook with my roommates.

Two of them are right in front of me and another one is beside me.

We are technology whores.

I am a restless spirit

2010-06-07T12:56:00.001+08:00

Click to make it larger.

Now do you get the idea of how easily bored I am?

this is my fml story, what's yours?

2010-06-01T19:20:00.002+08:00

Oh my gosh today was sooooo funnn!!!

I woke up at 3.01pm when I was supposed to meet a friend downstairs at 3.15pm.
We waited for the Intec bus... and waited... and waited...

and it was 3.35pm.

So we took a RapidKL bus, which stops at section 2, which then we would have to take another bus to section 17. It was raining not only cats and dogs, but elephants and whales. By 4.00pm, there was still no sign of the bus to 17.

Oh did I mention, my class starts at 4.10pm.

So we took a cab from 2 to 17, and it was still reeeeeeaaalllyyy raining. Like, really really.

And you know what? It was 4.11pm! Thank God! I'm only 1 minute late!!! I was sooo lucky!

Well, except for the part that my class was supposed to be in Makmal Bistari. And I had noooo idea where Makmal Bistari was. After asking about 3 people (who all pointed to different directions), we found it. And it was 4.32pm.

Soaking wet, from head to toe, literally, me and Ayysya apologized to the lecturer, who luckily, was very nice. In the class, we were told that there's been a new list for groups. And lucky lucky me, my one and only friend in the class, Ayysya, is changed to group F. Where 3 other closest friend of mine in TESL were.

So yes, I will be so alone. Like. So. Alone.

And the aircond in the lab was blasting a blizzard. Me, in my wet clothes, shivered like hell.

When class was over, I went to the shoe rack, only to find my slippers broke.

My RM49.90 Nose slippers which I bought last Friday, which was 5 days before this date, broke. So haha, lucky me again. I had to walk reeeeeeeaaaaaaaalllly carefully to the bus stop. When I walk carefully, I walk slowly. So we might miss the bus.

Damn.

Luckily, we didn't.

Thus, that is my story. And the reasonS WHY I AM NOT IN THE MOOD RIGHT NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!

FML.

Some people are born unfair

2010-05-30T15:01:00.003+08:00

When we're on the inferior side, everything we do is wrong. I have learned that that is a fact of life. Superiors can always beat you, no matter what you say, with a simple "because I'm your ____(insert superior title here)______"

Fairness is out of the question here. When you're superior, other people will seem like little minions for you to claw at for pleasure.

Because you're the master. And you can eat them for breakfast.

Why? Because you're superior.

Your kid

2010-05-27T21:20:00.003+08:00

Budak Yu.
Budak u.
Budak you?

Hahahahahahahahaahahahhahaha

Okay that phrase, or more accurately, label that you guys put upon the foreheads of university students are super lame. Come on! Think of something better!

Hey cam bagos je pompuan ni. Baru freshie dah kecoh.

Kan kan? You must think that. But the thing is, I AM SO LOVING UNI LIFE!

Staying somewhere else besides my own house, long term, is a weird experience for me. I mean, I have never ever attended boarding school, heck, I never ever even applied. But I find it not as difficult as I thought it would be. I mean, apart from washing clothes, everything else is pretty awesome. I can say that I think I'm pretty independent now. Hehehehe

I mean, like, right,

my roomies are cool. I'm in the same room as my long lost bestfriend since primary school! And the two other girls are fun!

campus is in the middle of food haven! KFC, Pizza Hut! Kayu nasik kandar! Ohmaigod. Best sial. Say bye-bye to hopes and dreams of becoming Kate Moss.

Facilities are aweshomz.

MY PROGRAMME RAWKZ.

and some other reasons I can't think about right now.

Akhir kata,
kemana tumpahnya kuah kalau tak ke pinggan.

Sekian, wabilahitaufikwalhidayah, assalamulaikumwarahmatuallahhiwabarakatuh, dan salam sejahtera salam 1Malaysia, salam 1UiTM, salan 1asasi, dan amendetahla lagi korang punye salam tahape2. babaiz

Last day of slothing around

2010-05-22T11:08:00.002+08:00

I'm supposed to be packing but I don't really know what else to pack. All the clothes (well most of it), are in the huge bag, as well as two pairs of shoes. Two bags are drying outside. And a few more pair of shoes are outside, and are to be packed some time later in the day.

Toiletries, stationary, and things like Maggi, Milo and such are yet to be bought.

Oh god, I just remembered. I do not have a pencil case. I can't use the old one, as it's in horrible shape. And to make one at the last minute is just... well, tak sempat lah kak.

I am so-ho-hoooo not ready.

The thought of not just going to college, but living somewhere else, without my pink bed, is just... I don't know... weird, maybe? I mean, new people that I don't even know will be my roommates. God I hope I get the ones that can tolerate me, and me them.
But in this past week, things had been so stressful at home. Everyone's suddenly in their puting beliung mood, even me. I guess it's actually nothing unusual but the thought of myself leaving in a few days makes me even more moodier-er.

Things to buy later:

White tees
Underwear. (I ain't gonna dry my old torn underwear in front of anyone.)
Baldi (I don't know why but everyone keeps asking me "ko dah bli baldi blom?")
Berus baju
Iron
Shampoo
Conditioner
Shower gel
Facial cleanser
Facial scrub
Facial toner
Ooohhh body scrub!
Deodorant
Detergent
Blanket. A thin blanket.
Towels

Stationary items:
Pencil case
Pens
Pencils
Erasers
Rulers
White-outs
Notepads
more notepads
more pens
Pencil lead
Staplers
Scissors
Puncher

Fewd:
Maggi
Bihun Tomyam PaMa
3-in-1 drinks (I hate theeeemmm!!!)
dan banyak lagi dan lagi dan lagi

Looking back up on the list, I feel like blacking out.

I am so-ho-hoooo not ready.

Help!

Can I have some whipped cream with that please?

2010-05-11T19:28:00.003+08:00

Drink less latte, buy more books.

Unfortunately, the quote above is easier said than done. The more lattes I drink, the more I need. I guess it's true what they say about caffeine addiction.

It's burns your money. Especially if you're living in Malaysia. Where good lattes cost RM76736921927 each.

Who 'they' are? My conscience. Though I refuse to admit I even have one. I am my own person.

Been saying that a lot nowadays.

And I truly miss blogging. I guess I'm (almost) back on track.

Okay back to the topic.
Why don't Malaysian coffee shops sell lattes? It's not like I'm purposely burning a hole in my pocket. It's just that I can't seem to find any good lattes in normal stalls. Can't even find ungood ones. I just can't seem to find lattes in Malaysian coffee shops!

When I grow up I'm gonna have my own latte machine. So I won't have to spend RM687689793q a day just for coffee.

I need my daily caffeine fix.
It's not a want. It's a need.
NEED I TELL YA!

Old people are always right

2010-05-04T23:12:00.002+08:00

TRUE STORY!!!!

Location: inside a KTM.
Time: approx 9.40am.
Witness: Me, who was on my way to work.

Wong Lee Kuan*: (sitting comfortably between two seats while 87328789798 other people were standing) The weather blablabla... Economy blablabla... Politics blablabla....

Rajandransamy*: I know. That's why the government blablabla... 39 degrees blablabla... All this crap blablabla...

Stesen seterusnya... Midvalley... Midvalley...

People rushing out of the train, more people coming in. Situation was very hectic. A woman dropped her baby's hankerchief/towel thing. Guy picked it up, woman was out of sight. Guy let it be... let it be...

Wong Lee Kuan: (sitting VERY comfortably between two seats without regard to the 87328789798 people standing)Haiyya!! These young people are really individualistic la! Cannot sacrifice a bit to help other people!

Rajandransamy: Tu lah. Haiyyo where got 1Malaysia liddat??

Wong Lee Kuan: (STILL sitting SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO VERY comfortably between two seats while 87328789798 other people were standing to death)Ya lah! The train isn't gonna leave that fast. (Note: train door closed 5 seconds after guy picked up towel)

ME: WTF????!!!

*names have been changed due to suspect's privacy, and the author's lack of knowledge of suspect.
Hehe.

It's my turn now

2010-05-02T20:12:00.001+08:00

I guess I got what I wanted.
Alhamdulillah.

Citizens of smashedcupcakeland!

2010-04-27T23:03:00.003+08:00

OMG I AM POSTING A POST!

I miss writing, I miss blogging. I even miss reading. Ironically, I seem to be reading less since I'm working in a bookstore. It's gonna take forever to finish the loot I brought in. Say bye bye to my wages...

My quote for the day:
Great literature can break all the rules for good literature and get away with it.
(M. Zaharudin, 2010)

Palotak kau.

I finally got my own laptop.
I'm not spending all my time with it like I thought I would. Really.

I don't hate my job.
I find it quite fun... Sometimes.

Some customers make me wanna cry.
People just love bullying younger people, don't they? And you expect the young to grow respect? Eff you.

I made a vow to myself:
"Thou shall not ask a customer 40 years above of age if they need a plastic bag sir/maam?. Thou should always smile and try not to imagine strangling bullies."

I have about 50 new books.

That,
in fact,
I will never finish.

Foundation intakes are during the end if May. 23rd to be precise. I wish I'll get in.
But 23rd May is like....... almost tomorrow.

I do not understand why married people cannot act like they're couples in love, like they used to, pre-marriage. Is it the rule of life or something?

My eyes are being weird.

This post is a result of me waiting for Afiq to call.

2010-04-18T22:01:00.001+08:00

Yeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyy TQ Papa!!!!

p/s: I really have nothing to blog about
=/

2010-04-12T22:02:00.002+08:00

It may not be a car. It may not be a phone.

It may not be Jimmy Choo's. It may not be an expensive handbag.

It may not be a hundred ringgit.

But it's lovely. And it's what I want.
And it's more than enough.

I love you!!!

All I need is a magic wand

2010-04-10T21:46:00.002+08:00

I wish I can be back. I wish I can blog like I used to. I wish I'm not so sad right now. I wish that all the anger would go away. I wish people practice what they preach. I wish I could vent it all out without causing trouble. I wish I could make all the negative emotions disappear with a wish. I wish things aren't so complicated. I wish my nose stops running. I wish my coughs would go away. I wish he wouldn't worry so much about me. I wish people would STOP IT. I wish my wishes would just come true.

I'm alive

2010-04-04T00:24:00.000+08:00

just to let you know

2010-03-15T21:48:00.003+08:00

I have clicked the new post button 5 times in the last 10 minutes. And after 2 words, I decided not to continue. But now I am. Why? Because my blog is boring me.
And.
I'm trying to not take a shower now. Hehe.

This was what I was supposed to post at 5pm on the 11th of March but I didn't manage to finish typing and left it to be forgotten as a draft.

I am grateful. It's not THE best. Tapi best lah jugak.
"Jangan mengharap tinggi-tinggi sangat, nanti kalau tak dapat, sedih sangat."- Afiq.
And babe, I held onto those words. So I gave myself a pleasant surprise :) I know how much have worked for this. And yes, I feel like I do deserve what I get. More than that is considered luck.

So thank you to everyone that has played their parts. And syukur Alhmadulillah.

Aku takdelah dapat patratos A ke, not even 11.
But I did get more than what I thought :)

This post is dedicated to people who LUUUUURRVVEE bookzzzz

2010-03-06T23:52:00.006+08:00

I work in the coolest bookstore evuh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Im in heaven.

But me+working=me+no time to blog.

Hence, I'm posting BookXcess's website for your enjoyment.

CLICK HERE TO ACCESS BOOKXCESS's BLOG.

Teheeee access bookxcess. Geddit??

Woah. I'm actually promoting. They should pay me more.

Shadow Puppets are boring

2010-03-04T20:53:00.002+08:00

I just discovered I can make shadow animals with my hands.

I can make a dog
a snake
a penguin
a dinosaur
and some other weird animals I can't describe

aaaannnndddd I think I'm freaking my boyfriend out. I realized that I was giggling into the phone hysterically while seeing the penguin waddling on the wall. It was really funny, really.
It just wasn't smart to think it was while being on the phone, with your boyfriend.

Yeah.
I'd think I was crazy if I was him.

Good thing I'm not him!! Yeay! Back to googling other things you summon to life on the wall with your hands!!

Ignored commitments

2010-03-02T00:16:00.003+08:00

To readers that are still in school:

If people tell you that life post-SPM and pre-university is gonna suck reeeeaaaallyyyyy baddd and you would wish that you were back at school two weeks after your cry of absolute school uniform freedom,

don't believe them. All lies.

Well, at least I'm not wishing that I'm still at school. It's lame. And I don't think it would be an overstatement to compare it to prison. To those still in school: Hahah. Sucks for you.

But it doesn't mean that I am having the time of my life either. Those who are motivated enough to work, they're lucky. At least their days aren't filled with hours of self-arguments about what to do this week that will always end up with both sides losing, and me doing nothing this week, like the previous weeks. Surpriiiiiiissseee......

But I'm having a hell of a time celebrating my freedom from school. I ain't complainin' nuthin bout dat dawg.

Now this post may seem important, but it actually isn't. It's just a way of spending time, at 12.25am in the morning. Oh, tomorrow, well actually today, is Tuesday. So instead of complaining that I got nothing to do, I am expressing my appreciation on the lack of things to do on weeknights. I don't have to sleep early, don't have to wake up early (besides my Mom's ear-bleeding shrills), don't have to have a plan. Not like I stick to them anyways.

The funny thing is, though, despite my too-much-of-a-free-time, I'm neglecting important commitments. Like this blog, my cafe, and my farm, like I mentioned in my previous posts. The lethargy just infects your vitals like a virus. No cure. Just treatments. Bit by bit, your brain dies. Metaphorically, of course.

But hey, I'm having a thrill watching House. That's all I do all day. Thank God for my sister's season 1- season 6 House DVDs. Up to disc 5 season 2 now.

Okay I'm gona stop boring you.

By the way, I think that episode when Cameron got high and slept with Chase was hot. Grr.

Bye.

In case you're SO jealous you're not living my life

2010-02-27T18:17:00.005+08:00

Based on my team's differential diagnosis, if you're having problem reading that, you're stupid. Click it, genius.

Oh how fantastic it is to have my life.
Hah.

oh and in case you didn't know that I was being sarcastic, that symptom has just proved my diagnosis.

2010-02-25T20:43:00.001+08:00

I AM NOT INSPIRED.

AT ALL.

damn.

KITTINNNZZZZZ!!!!!!

2010-02-21T21:12:00.001+08:00

whaddup

2010-02-21T20:32:00.003+08:00

I know I've been quiet. I don't even know why. Life isn't busy at all! I'm not working, I'm procrastinating on my driving license (and since the place I registered is the headquarters, I'm on my own until I get my L), I am certainly not taking any short courses, and I don't even hang out with friends as much as I'm supposed to.

Despite of my slow and wasted days, I haven't thought of updating my blog, checking my farm and cafe, looking for a job, or do productive things.

Hah.

News in that results are out on the 15th or 16th of March. Wow. Takotnye. Siang malam teringatkannya.

Right.

I'm laughing about it now but you just wait on the day itself, 5 minutes before I get my results. I'll break down like Britney Spears.

But hey, this week is the most 'happening' week in the history of my post-school pre-university life. Went out with the baybeh last Sunday, had primary school reunion bbq on Wednesday, went out with Najwa and the baybeh on Friday.

...........
okay I now officially declare that I don't have a life.

Bye2 I have to go back being boring.

"I rindu..." "I lg rindu..." "I lg rindu..."

2010-02-13T19:34:00.005+08:00

This is how a conversation between me and my Mohamad Afiq usually goes:

Mohamad Afiq: I love you babe.

Maya: I love you too.

Mohamad Afiq: Do u miss me?

Maya: Yes. Of course. You...

Mohamad Afiq: Yes?

Maya: You nak dengar bunyik dolphin lg tak?

Mohamad Afiq: Alaa I dah penah dengar laaaa....

Maya: Oh.. Tanak dengar takpe la..

Mohamad Afiq: Nak! Nak!

Maya: Oke. "eEeEeEeeIiIiIIIiiEeeEeiIKkkKkKk!!!!!" Ala tak jadi!

Mohamad Afiq: Jadi la tu.

Maya: Tak! Jap. Lg skali! "EeEEeeEeiiKkkK!" Alaaaa tak jadi lagiiii!!!

Mohamad Afiq: Okay la tuuuuuuuu....

Maya: Jap jap denga la yg ni confirm jadi "eeEeEeeEEiIiIiIIkKkkKkkk!!!" Yes! Jadi pon!

Mohamad Afiq: ............

Selamat Hari Kekasih esok sayang :)

Forget about "If words could kill"

2010-02-12T12:07:00.002+08:00

If words could cause you just a tiny bit of damage,

I'd be as dead as a fly in a spiderweb.

Which is, pleasant to think about actually. Because then the fly doesn't have to face the world anymore. Haha thinking about dieing. That's as cliche as cliche gets. So... teenager-ish. So immature.

Oh how I wish I could kill people and get away with it.

Valentino Rossi

2010-02-10T16:43:00.007+08:00

This is a conversation between a six-year-old Muslim girl and her father.

Girl: Father, today I learned at school that Valentines Day is a Christian celebration. Is it wrong for us Muslims to celebrate it?

Father: It is a Christian celebration, dear. But it is for a good cause. So no, it's not wrong for us to cherish love on that day.

Girl: America's ex-president Bush is Jewish right, father?

Father: Yes dear.

Girl: Does he celebrate Valentines Day too? Because he's not Christian.

Father: Well, I guess he does. Because Valentines Day has become more of a celebration of love rather than celebrating it according to it's religious roots.

Girl: He doesn't sound like he has much love in his soul. I wonder, if all the Muslim children were to send him Valentine gifts and cards, maybe he would stop killing those unfortunate Muslims. Because he would realize that we're not as cruel as some of us made us seem. Maybe he would realize that we want peace, and love.

Father: *touched by his girl's words*

Girl: Maybe us Muslims should be more peaceful than hateful by trying to condemn other religions. A friend of mine told me not to celebrate Valentines Day because its roots is not from Islam, thus we have to ban it. Is that true father?

Father: No dear.That's not necessary. Just because it's not Islamic does not mean it's evil.

P/s:
When we say Valentines Day, we get a picture of a man and woman celebrating it together. They might be husband and wife, they might be boyfriend and girlfriend. We were brought up thinking of Valentines Day as a day to love. But why can't love be applied to family and friends? Is it still wrong to celebrate it with family?

Question of the day:

2010-02-09T23:21:00.001+08:00

If vegetarians eat veges.

Than what do humanitarians eat?

Eat my dust Counterstrike!!

2010-02-08T01:39:00.002+08:00

I am SO happy with my boyfriend. I am very proud of him.
This is because he abandoned those killing, shooting, violent games and opts for.......
Jeng Jeng Jeeeeenggg......

JOJO'S FASHION SHOW!!!

Yeaaaayy!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Though he finished the game now. And moving on to Cake Queen! Yeahh baybayyhh!! Go on! I'm rooting for you!!

Woo-hoo!!!

Haih. Not again.

2010-02-01T10:43:00.004+08:00

I was reading a book when I received a text message from my best friend, Lea.

"I needed a place to stay in Penang so I asked Afiq if I could move in with him. Hope you understand."

This was what went on in my mind: WTF THIS IS MALAYSIA SUKA HATI KAU JE NAK MOVE IN MOVE IN BTW HE'S MY BOYFRIEND!!!!!

This was what I texted back: "Yeah yeah okay. Be good."

So I called Afiq the next week.

"Watcha doing?"

*some muffled noises at the back*

"Nothing. You?"

"Nothing. Mana Lea?"

"She's.... Um........... out?"

"Where's Lea Afiq?"

"I don't know."

*Lea giggled at the back*

"Babe??? Why are you doing this to me???? You're cheating on me with my bestest friend????? How could you!!!!!"

"Maya I can explain"

*tuuuttt tuuuttt tuuuttt tuuuutt* (dialing tone bukan mencarut)

So I drove to Penang and barged straight into their house. They weren't there. Just a vampire. A very very sexy vampire with a nice butt. And it ain't Edward.

"Maya... my Beloved..."

"Adrian!!!!!!"

Then Afiq came out from his room. With a girl on tow. And it's not Lea.

"Told you I could explain! Lea's out. I'm not cheating on you with your best friend! It's just Kate Beckinsale!"

"You still cheated so I'm gonna run off with Adrian!"

"Please Maya!!! I only made out with lea once or twice!!!"

And then the alarm bunyik.

Why does the alarm always bunyik during the best part??

Haihhhh I need to read just one book at a time. Romance and thrillers just don't mix. So does talking on the phone with your boyfriend and texting your best friend at the same time.

The lesson learnt: Girls are born to multitask. Girls Rule!!!

How to Torture People:

2010-01-28T18:40:00.003+08:00

Welcome to How to Torture People! In this episode, we will feature a way to torture people without having to risk ourselves going to jail!

What is more fun than torturing people without any risks (except being kicked in the forehead by the tortur-ee)? Absolutely nothing! So yes! Let's get on with the show!!

(I didn't think to take pictures while I was doing this so I'm just going to get pictures from Google)

So first, the things you need:

Belacan

Onions (bawang merah)

A good dose of your market's best Cili Api

Aaaannndd some leftover nasik putih.

Oh before you forget, this is not Mari Memasak Bersama Cik Maya.
This is How to Torture People: No-Risk-Of-Going-to-Jail Edition!!

So yes, it's easy-peasy. Just take the first three items and blend them together with some water to make a paste. Alternately, you can just use this paste to pour on someone's face while they're sleeping to torture them. But hey, that's too boring! So proceed on reading for funner steps!

How much of each item is up to you. Personally, for a serving of 3-5 people, I'd recommend you to measure about the size of three thumbs for your belacan, one medium sized onion, and a handful of cili api. I don't really measure when I cook. That explains why this is NOT Mari Memasak Bersama Cik Maya.

So yeah, you put a lil' bit of oil in the wok and tumis the paste. Add some salt, about a half a heaped teaspoon. Tumis it some more, and add the rice!

So now it's time to gaul2 the rice. Agak-agak dah rata, turn down the heat and let it "simmer" for about 3 minutes. Huahahaha simmer. You can add prawns if you want to as soon as the nasik is rata. 3 minutes are more than enough for prawns to cook.

So now you have your torturing device.
The best way to use this device against people is to take them to the beach in the afternoon, with no ice-cold drinks, and let 'em eat!
MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!

In case you're laughing and thinking what a cruel thing to do to people, WATCH YO' MOUTH BIATCH CZ THIS GAL HAZ DONE IT *holla!

Okay okay fine I didn't mean to torture them. Like I said, I don't measure when I cook and this leads to burning mouths. Just tortured myself and my brother tadi. Hheeeeeee

So I would like to take this opportunity to say sorry to my boyfriend Mohamad Afiq, my friend Najwa, Najwa's boyfriend Buk, and Afiq's friends, whose names are too many for me to list down every one of you guys. I understand if you refuse to go to the beach with me from now on. And I also understand if you are still traumatized by the experience even if it happened a month ago.

Pisaut!

Ini bukan puisi seseorang yang depressed

2010-01-26T21:03:00.007+08:00

apabila badan terasa lesu dan lemah
apabila fikiran tidak lagi berada dalam keadaan yang waras

apabila hati tidak lagi menjadi organ yang boleh diharapkan untuk menentukan sesuatu
apabila segala deria menjadi bercelaru
apabila lidah terdiam terkedu

apabila tangan mula menggigil
apabila takdir mula memanggil

apabila rakan dan taulan mula terasa jauh
apabila keluarga bukan lagi tempat berpaut

apabila kemarahan berkecamuk

apabila kesedihan mula melimpah
apabila masa mula menyumpah seranah
apabila kepala seperti mahu pecah apabila jiwa mula terasa resah apabila terasa seperti ketagihan dadah

apabila perut mula menyanyi lagu Lady Gaga

(Rah-rah-ah-ah-ah
Roma-Roma-ma-ah!
Ga-ga-ooh-la-la!)

oh apabila aku mengidam Nasi Lemak Antarabangsa........

ini hanya puisi seseorang yang sedang lapar.

Legion: the honest-to-God summary and review.

2010-01-24T18:42:00.003+08:00

**spoilers**

If you're interested with movies involving angels with massive guns and frail old ladies with sharp teeth climbing on ceilings, this might be THE movie for you.

But before you go spend RM12 and another RM5 on popcorns, I suggest you read this first. Eventhough this may contain spoilers.

So yeah, God decided that all hope is lost on mankind and decided to wipe out our existence from the Earth. So angels were told to possess human beings and now they're angel-zombies things who like to eat people and curse at 8-month-pregnant ladies before climbing up ceilings like spiders. Oh yeah, and that was the coolest part.

Like I said, God lost faith. So he sent the angel Michael, a hot hot stud who drives a police cruiser with hot-shot guns and ammo in the boot to a deserted diner in Paradise Falls to kill the baby inside the 8-month-pregnant lady. But instead of doing what God told him to, he went against the order and protected the baby instead. This is because somehow, it was decided that this baby inside a random lady's belly is the fate of mankind. If the baby survives, mankind will. Of all the babies in the world, this particular one is our saviour.

Why did Michael went against God's orders? Because of all the kindness shown on the Earth, of all the devotion other people show, Michael decided that a man called Jeep, who looked after his dad after his mom left them, and who loves this 8-month-pregnant lady who wasn't even pregnant with his baby who would never love him the same way, is the kindest man in the whole world. And the only reason he still have faith in mankind. Haha.

At first there were eight people in the diner. Who were all coincedentally stranded in the diner. Nine including Michael. There were Jeep, Charlie (the pregnant biatch), Jeep's dad (diner owner), truck guy with scary gun, The Posh Looking Family with Slutty Daughter (Dad, Mom, Aubrey(slutty but nice daughter)), Percy(the Diner's cook). Who all died except for Jeep and Charlie. And Michael. And the baby.

So yeah. Towards the end, when the angel-zombies could not get near them because the baby's born, the angel Gabriel came down with his bulletproof wings and body armour. Which was weird why would an angel need all those things since they're immortal. But turns out they're not. They can bleed. And die. Yeah. Michael 'died'. Since he went against God's orders, his wings got cut off. So he didn't have protection. Gabriel did. To use the wings against guns, he had to spin around so fast. Hahahaha this part was cool.

And as I told you earlier, Michael died. And suddenly a thought came to me: where does an angel go when he dies? Home. Hahah. Funneh. And he did went home. Because later on in the movie, he came to save Jeep and Charlie from Gabriel. This time, he had wings. And body armour. So dying wasn't really a big deal. It was just a shortcut to home. He got a change of clothes, and came back down again. Hah. Smart.

So yeah, before Michael saved them, before he was reincarnated, these tattoos showed up on Jeep's body. Similar to Michael's tattoos. They're instructions to something. It would be cool if Jeep got wings as well but he didnt. Sad.

So yeah. Michael defeated Gabriel but didn't 'kill' him and suddenly he told Gabriel that God doesn't like him anymore.

The End.

What I thought of the movie?
Bullshit.
3/10.
(that's for the great graphics)(and the wall-climbing old lady)

New Year's Resolution!!11!!one!!oneonesatu!!111

2010-01-20T20:57:00.004+08:00

It's the third week of January and it's a little late for twenty ten resolutions.

But This Year I Will:

high five the person seating next to me.
watch a documentary.
think about it.
eat a whole tomato like an apple.
look up at the sky.
snap my fingers (!!)
look for the silver lining. (the ones related to clouds, not Kamdar.)
Make. More. Money.
write a story.
focus.
say hi to a stranger.
laugh a lot.
dress up.
do what I love.
avoid drama.
re-read a book from high school.
bake cookies from scratch.
listen to my heart.
take the stairs, not the escalator.

and the number one 2010 resolution,

This Year I Will
get jiggy with it.

Yeay!!!

Now make your list!

click that thang to get your NYR!

hehehe didn't think I made my list myself did ya?
:p

Chances

2010-01-20T12:39:00.002+08:00

You do not wait for chances. You seek out those teeny weeny chances that doesn't seem likely to be in your favour, and stretch them out so they become big.

Life's in favour of those who try.

Sincerely,

me.

Budak tu pakai skinny jeans, a statement tee, a snowcap, dan eyeliner. He's a guy. And he had whole team of duffus on tow.

2010-01-18T15:46:00.004+08:00

I went to Sungei Wang with my family to have lunch on Saturday. As soon as we got there, I remembered the most important rule EVER. The importantest unwritten rule eh-vuh.

Unwritten rule of life #7631
-never go to the Bukit Bintang area on a Saturday.

But yes, what's done is done. We were already there. And regret filled my soul.

So yes. Our lunch went on smoothly, and we decided to take a stroll around Sg Wang and Low Yat to show my sister's boyfriend, Sean, what's it like here.

We were walking around when my sister almost bumped into boy which I think was about 15 or 16 years old (budak skolah. Huahahahahah bangganya ckp camni). Not knowing I was related to my sister, he said these words out loud while looking back at my sister.

"Hish gemok nih."

The thing was, he did not say those words directly to my sister, instead, he waited for her to be out of slapping-him-in-the-face area. Which was, to me, quite cowardly and STUPID. Not to mention rude and uncivilized.

So my sister turned around, but with the crowd between them, she could not chase him and choke slam him. He laughed with his friends, with a smirk on his face, feeling so brave and powerful.

But like I mentioned, he did not know I, who was rrriiighhhtt in front of him at that time, was related to the lady he was so rude to a moment ago.

He realized that quite quickly.

My highly trained eyes locked on him and he realized that he is now the target. So he ran, getting attention from everyone. But no, he can never get away because I'm programmed to detect idiots. So I yelled "WOI" and the whole world slowed down and the supersonic energy of my voice made him fall down. I shot eye-laser at him and he burnt to death on the floor and all his friends screeched like puny little carrot-people.

Okay maybe not.

But I did looked at him straight in the eyes with an expression saying "SIAP KAU" and my left hand automatically raised, ready to smack him right in the face.

But what did he do?

Walked awkwardly fast, as soon as he realized I was related to the person he made fun of. So I yelled, "WOI." He looked back and walked even faster. So did I chase after him?

No.

Why waste my energy on someone as stupid as that?

So what we did do was think of lines we would say if we met him.

"Jakun ke tak pernah pegi KL?"
*purposely bump into him* "oops sorry, I gemok. U kurus sangat. Laa miskin ke? Tak cukup makan?"
"Mak tak ajar manners ke?"
"The zoo called, they needed their jackass back."

So okay, I just added number 4 but it's hella funny. Huahahahahahahah I crack myself up.

So yah.
Inilah dia padah tidak mengikut the Unwritten Rules of Life.

We hope that you choke. That You Choke.

2010-01-18T15:24:00.002+08:00

Just listen.

Futuro Des Kamingsoontos

2010-01-17T16:31:00.003+08:00

I was thinking about the future a few moments ago.

What laptop am I going to get for uni...
Will Papa even buy me a laptop for uni...
How many pairs of shoes should I get for uni...
Do I need more flats, sneakers or flipflops...
Bags... I need more bags... for uni of course...

And the most important question of all...

Will I even get into uni....??

I was almost panicked by that question. Menyesal plak mase SPM aku main Pokemon Fire Red yang dah lawan gym ke 6 pastu tiba-tiba file dia mampos.
What if my results suck??
What if aku tak dapat masuk uni??

Kalau tak dapat masuk..... WAAAAAAAARRGHHH THE POSSIBILITIES SCARE ME!!!!

Then how the hell will I get a laptop and new shoes and bags!!!!

Damn. Susahnya hidup.

1Malaysia

2010-01-17T15:38:00.003+08:00

Aku tertengok iklan 1Malaysia kat TV berapa tah haritu.
Jalan ceritanya begini:
*Beberapa nama dan butiran-butiran kecil dan dialog telah ditukar untuk memelihara copyright penerbit iklan. (Sebenarnya aku agak terlupa.)

Jijah: Senah! Aku telah berjaya memasuki universiti di Kuala Lumpur! Hoo-reh!

Senah: Ya! Aku jua begitu! Bagaimana pula dengan Devi?

Jijah: Entah! Aku jua tidak tahu! Mari kita menziarahi beliau sekarang juga tanpa perlu memberitahu ibu bapa kita kemana kita pergi kerana kita tinggal di kampung dan di kampung selamat bukan seperti di bandar!

Senah: Yah!

2 saat selepas itu....

Senah & Jijah: Deviii... Deviii... bukalah pintu ini!

Devi: Yaaa.... Aim kamingg....

Senah: Devi, berjayakah kau memasuki universiti?

Devi: Dapat...

Jijah: Baguuuss!!

Devi: Tapi.....

Jijah: Tapi apa Devi?

Devi: Kau orang tahukan, ibu aku ibu tunggal. Masih perlu menyara adik beradik aku. Masakan bisa aku belajar jauh-jauh.

Senah: Janganlah begitu Devi... Pasti ibu kau ada simpanan bagi menyara pelajaran kau.

Devi: Aku tak sampai hati......................................

2 saat selepas itu......

Lelaki Melayu: Kaakk... *tok tok tok ketuk pintu*

Mak Devi: *bersama-sama dengan Devi serta anak2 yang lain di depan pintu* Ya? Ada apa ramai-ramai datang ini?

Lelaki Cina: Kami ada dinga tintang Devi bijaya masuk itu koles.

Lelaki India: Ya akak.. Jadi kami juga satu kampung sudak kutip itu dana untuk meringankan beban akak.

Lelaki Melayu: Ya. Kitakan 1Malaysia.................

-The End-

So the moral of the story is, tidakkah anda rasa iklan di atas ini terlalu mencuba untuk mengekspresikan elemen 1Malaysia sehingga iklannya menjadi sedikit racist? Ironiknya, 1Malaysia diadakan untuk memusnahkan segala elemen-elemen racist di dalam diri warganegara Malaysia.

But sometimes, when you try too hard to not be racist, it's racist.

pee ass (wahahahaha aku rasa ayat ni camkul je. *camkul= macam cool):
aku dah benti kije. Malas aahhh. Hehe

thirthyeightnow

2010-01-16T13:16:00.003+08:00

Two months to go and we've been together for 40 months.

It's 1.16 pm on the 16/1 and I'm happy to say thank you for being with me for 38 months now babe.

:)

I <3 U

If there's a camel up a hill...

2010-01-08T23:57:00.001+08:00

ANYONE TAKING LITERATURE IN ENGLISH FOR SPM 2010?

2010-01-06T17:23:00.004+08:00

Here's a great book deal for you.

I have four LiE books with me. All 4 bought last year in March or something at Kinokuniya KLCC (fuyyoh detail gile ni). All 4 looking almost as good as new. All 4 only have been used by me.

And I'm selling all 4. With at least 50% off the normal price of each book.

The books I'm talking about are:

Fasting, Feasting by Anita Desai (Novel)
Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury (Novel
Julius Caesar by William Shakespeare (Play)
An Inspector Calls by J.B Priestley and other plays (Play)

The pictures below are scanned images of each of the books. The left hand side is the front cover and the right hand side is the back cover.

They are the real images for the real books I currently own. These images are not googled. Also shown on the back cover of 3 out of 4 books are the real prices.

Fasting, Feasting by Anita Desai
Original price: Can't recall
Selling price: RM 20

Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury
Original price (as seen on back cover): RM28.08
Selling price: RM 12

Julius Caesar by William Shakespeare
Original price (as seen on back cover): RM25.50
Selling price: RM 12

An Inspector Calls by J. B. Priestley and other plays
Original price (as seen on back cover): RM 54.95
Selling price: RM 22

All prices are negotiable. To those who are currently reading this, if you have friends or relatives who might be interested, please tell them about this.

Contact me via my blogspot chatbox on the right hand side.
Or my Facebook. Search Maya Zaharudin.
Or my phone number 0197317939.

How you're going to get the book?
COD only available in Cheras/ Langat/Kajang/KL area.
Postage costs are to be paid by the buyer.

TQ.

Forms of literature that mess with your head should not be taken into the mind within the same period of time

2010-01-06T15:05:00.002+08:00

(Post contains spoilers)

That is a long title. Really.

Okay, so, I want to talk about two things. Two forms of literature that messed with my head which I have taken into my mind within the same period of time.

So yeah, these forms of literature are:

A movie you might have heard of called The Imaginarium of Dr Parnassus
A novel with the title The End of Mr Y by Scarlett Thomas

The Imaginarium of Dr Parnassus (TIDP) is the last movie in which Heath Ledger was in. He didn't even got to finish it. So they chose Johnny Depp, Jude Law, and Collin Farrel to portray his character in scenes he didn't get to do. Because this is a whimsical sort of movie (Like Mr Magorium's Magical Emporium and such), that did not seem awkward. Instead, it breathed depth into the movie. Giving Heath Ledger's character, Tony Sheperd, who is a liar behind all of his charity work. You see, him having many faces is a metaphor for how much of a liar he is.

For the synopsis, click here.

In The End of Mr Y (TEMY), there's a world called a troposphere, where you could get in by drinking a mixture of holy water and carbo-veg. It's a world where all your thoughts are stored in. Sort of like a hard drive for thoughts.

For the synopsis, click here.

So yes, both of these stories tend to do things to your brain. Both are stories about how the mind works, and they make us think, which I tend to do too much on insignificant things. Now I tend to do more of that. And it leads me to more headaches. Which I am currently experiencing.

Both are GREAT forms of literature. But I'm warning you, do not watch/read both within less than a week of each other.

It might make you insane.

Which Car??

2010-01-03T22:40:00.002+08:00

Would you exchange a Mercedes for a Kancil?
Yeah, me neither.

Even if the Merc is a bit high maintenanced, mengada-ngada and such, I'll keep it. Rather than exchanging it for a Kancil that you'll get bored with in 5 seconds because of the lack of it's 'maturity' and such. Because you know why? If I can get the Merc in the first place, if I decided to get the Merc in the first place, I must be as mengada-ngada as the car to except it's mengada-ngadaness. Kan? So yeah, deal with the decision you've made. But no, you exchanged your Merc with Pak Abu punya Kancil yang baru setahun jagung. And why? You won't even tell people why. That's the problem. Now the Merc's insurance company would have to deal with problems caused by your stupidness.

Hish. Geram plak aku ngan mamat nih.

TwentyTen

2010-01-03T21:33:00.002+08:00

Hello people. I know this is a bit late but here's my 2010 post! Yeay!

............................... ............... .............................
.............. *bunyik cengkerik* ...............
............
..............................

Alrite... So what do I have to say about twentyten? I seemed so excited in the beginning... Now I'm lost for words. Hahahaha lost for words. Cliche gila. Why is it lost for words anyways? Shouldn't it be my words are lost? I lost my words? The words that I was about to say got lost?

All rite I'll shut up.

So everyone, here was how I celebrated New Year's Eve!!! OMG I AM SO FCKING EXCITED TO TELL YOU!! This is SO going to beat everyone else's parties and dinners and dates and 98yidshoidw0d87dwq87jdhdj[dq[o,.

On New Year's Eve, at about 9.30pm, Jihan my workmate and I, carried a bucket of mugs and went to wash them at the janitor's room located INSIDE the gent's toilet on level 3 at Pavilion. Why am I telling you each and every detail? I don't know. But it was the coolest New Year's Eve EVER. Just because it was awkward, and embarrassing, and.... Okay fine it sucked. But I can tell you this, it's memorable.

So yeah. At 10.15pm I was still at somewhere in BB. Lots of people, and lots more are still coming. And what did I do? I went home. 10.15pm on New Year's Eve in KL and I went home. I went back to my boring home. I so don't have a life. And you know what? Even my parents were surprised.

So yeah, that was how I celebrated twenty ten.

The End.

Seriously, my blog posts are getting boring-er everyday.

So here's a quick recap

2009-12-29T23:43:00.002+08:00

{Warningtos. Very longstos blog postos ahead.}

When I have a huge gap between blog posts I usually find myself ~~saying~~ typing something like this:

"I know it's been a gazillion/quadrillion/umpteenthlion years since I last blogged, but [insert exaggerated but too-brief-barely-explaining reason here].

But no. Not today. I am here, and will stay here, until I say what I want to say.

If you sign into my Blogger account, and look into my post list, there's about a hundred thousand drafts that I started but did not finish because of the lack of time. And when I do have the time to finish it, I've forgotten about what I intended to blog about. So yeah, in simple words, I am nothing but a lifeless-hectic-zombie-monkey-person-lady now.

So until the 11th of January, I will be at work at least 9 and a half hours a day at work, almost everyday. It's either I start at 9.45am, until 7.30pm, or 12.15pm until 10pm, or 9.45am until 10pm.

And people told me life after SPM would consist of lazing around the house gaining ten thousand kgs while flicking through the channels and playing Pokemon Red on the computer, everyday.

At least I'm making money!
Which I will get at the end of NEXT month which requires me to be broke THIS MONTH until I actually get to smell those greens. But yeah, I'm grateful, the shop's paying me good. But I'm too lazy to use the advantage. Instead, I opt to work just for a month. When I could be making gazillions.

Due to my decision to work my ass off three days after SPM, I've been missing out on the post-school life I've been so excited about since I WAS BORN. I've only been out with friends THREE times since. THUH-REE. 3!!!! And it's been like, 3 WEEKS since SPM?? Oh goshh.... And I haven't even been out with close friends. The first was to PD. Okay, that was like SOOOOO FUUUNNNNNN but I'm kinda pissed because I was supposed to go with my classmates but ended up going with Afiq, Najwa, her boyfriend, and my boyfriend's friends instead. Tapi best :p

The second was to OU. Again, with my boyfriend and his friends. Met Leya, Shila and Iena. Whom I haven't seen in like AGES. Saw Sherlock Homes which was aweeesommmeezzzzZzZzZZzzz. And had dinner at Murni. Which my sister had been talking about since years ago when she was still on her foundation.

And I have just back home from the third. Saw Alvin and the Chipmunks 2. Hahahahahaha The Chippettes?? Naseb baek laa subtitle tak tuka bulat2. I had fun because it's been a while since we've had a proper date :) But babe, let's not spend RM18 on a nasi-biryani-like meal again okay. Naseb baek sedap.

Typing out 'sedap' makes me think of Ikea meatballs. WAAAAAAAAA NAAAAKKKKKKK LAAAAAAAAA!!!!!

And for new year, I don't know what I'm going to do. Got work until 10. But hey, I'll be in KL. Tajkkan nak blk kot huahahahahahaha Not going to celebrate it with Afiq since he's going back to Penang on the 1st. ... Yeah... Suddenly got that feeling in the tummy you get when you don't want something to happen but it's inevitable. Won't be seeing him for at least a month... .......................

I don't have the mood to blog anymore.
I miss him already.

That may be a good thing though, me, not having the mood to blog anymore. Bcs this has been veeeeeeeerrryyy long. And it pretty much summed up everything I wanted to say for the past 3 weeks.

So bye.

2009-12-17T00:01:00.002+08:00

Wah lame tak bukak internet. Rase mcm jakon plak sekejap. I'm working now. I know I know stupid decision patotnye pas exam relax dulu tunggu sebulan baru keje. But noooooo I just have to start working 3 days after!

Alah, dah dapat offer. Rezeki xbaik ditolak kaaaannn.......

So yes. I am exhausted. Mentally and physically.

The End- the prologue

2009-12-10T14:42:00.003+08:00

I used to wake up every weekday morning at 5.30 am and shower and ray and put on my school uniform and socks and go back to sleep.

I used to set my phone alarm to wake me up at 6.43.

I used to wake up at 6.56 because I kept on snoozing the alarm which rang every 3 minutes.

I used to wash my face and brush my teeth and put my school tudung on go downstairs and wait for Mama.

I used to have new pens everytime there's a test or exams.

I used to not do my tests really well.

I used to think that tests are a waste of time.

I used to sleep during Agama, behind the text book.

I used to fake an interested expression during Math and Add Math.

I used to try to go to Physics as late as I could.

I used to moan and sigh everytime the Physics teacher kept us late during recess.

I used to buy Nasi Ayam Cik Ani for RM3 but with ayam sikit gile.

I used to roll my eyes upon seeing her.

I used to complain because she wouldn't let the students use proper forks and spoons.

I used to search high and low for proper forks and spoons.

I used to hate using plastic ones.

I used to buy teh O ais but changed my choice of drink once the ice blended stall started to operate.

I used to buy ice blended orange.

I used to not finish my drink and wait for the boys to come.

They used to come charging like bulls over leftovers.

I used to buy some snacks and go into class.

I used to not eating the snacks I bought because the boys have finished it.

I used to arrive at Agama class pretty late because it's after recess.

I used to try to refrain myself from going to the school toilet.

I used to walk in the staff room and talk to the English teachers.

I used to let my homework pile up and do them n the last minute.

I used to borrow my friend's notes/exercise and copy them.

I used to complain about Maths and Add Maths homework.

I used to clap my hands on assigned essays.

I used to think Sivik was a waste of time.

I used to not do my folios.

I used to salam the Chemistry teacher and getting hugged by her.

I used to think she's the tallest woman in the world.

I used to skip after school Biology classes.

I used to sleep during morning Biology classes.

I used to bring Alia or Najwa home.

I used to laugh my heart out when it's someone's birthday.

They used to sing Happy Birthday at that particular person and beat them up. (in a friendly but hurting way)

They used to sing Happy Birthday or clap when someone we don't know came into our class to see the teacher.

I used to despise the school's administration.

I used to laugh at some of the teacher's close mindedness and big mouths.

I used to buy sate ikan.

I used to buy mingomingo ice cream.

I used to refrain from staying back at school to study.

I used to skip koko.

I used to go to Imran's house with 10 other people and we would squeeze inside Imran's room to watch a movie. All 10 of us.

I used to walk back home with thirteen million people.

I used to doodle on people's arm.

I used to laugh at people who were stressed abut exams.

I used to hate school.
I used to be so eager to finish it.
I am glad it's over.
But I do miss the things I used to do.

Although it ends tomorrow,

2009-12-07T18:35:00.002+08:00

I feel guilty. Tomorrow's my last paper for SPM and what did I do all day?

A lot of things.

None of them involved studying.

It's the last time I'll be facing Chemistry so why am I not spending our last moments intimately together? I don't know. You tell someone else to lock herself up in her room with a gigantuous book and notes that contains sentences that don't even make sense. And not a single metaphore? Oh come on.

Not targetting anything beyond my ability.
a B should be fine. Or a C. Hah. Way to go Maya, you sure do think big.

If only anyone could understand that I AM NOT A FACTUAL PERSON. How does Iron(II) become Iron(III) is not important to me. I don't freaking care about the composition of detergent. Isn't it easier to go and buy some at TESCO rather than screwing your head about it? TESCO is just 10 minutes away! And plus, the only type of Iron I care about can't oxidise or reduce. They can only make wrinkles go away.

I guess I shouldn't be talking like this. I don't wanna get jinxed by chemistry hocus pocus.

I'm going back to reading about contact process.

See ya.

An (late but) unbiased review about

2009-12-03T16:30:00.002+08:00

something you would think I'd be SO biased about.

Wait for it.... wait for it....

Jeng jeng jeeenggg. Here comes The Twilight Saga: New Moon review.

(This was supposed to be posted earlier but I was busy with exams so here it is. A week later than I intended it to be.)

****WARNING****
*****may******
***contain*****

*******Spoilers.*******
and yes, this is a very long post.

Being the second movie of the world famous novel series from Stephenie Meyer, to say the least, The Twilight Saga: New Moon, or it's original novel name, New Moon, had fans hyperventilating around the globe waiting for it to show in cinemas. These hard core Twilight fans, or Twihards, had gone through months yearning to see Edward Cullen, as portrayed by Robert Pattinson, shirtless. Yes, ladies. He's shirtless. And to those who haven't seen it yet, be prepared to squirm and I advice you to not watch New Moon for the first time with your boyfriends. It might cause war.

Still going on about the Edward Anthony Masen Cullen Shirtless phenomenon, at first glimpse you would not blink, expecting him to be pant-less too. Yes, his pants were a bit too low-down. You could see the line of his cro..... well, you know what. No need to go down into the dirty details now. As the first close up of this phenomenon only showed his upper torso, and those 'hinting' lines, some of you straight women, and a few guys too, might not be able to pay attention to the next scene, where Bella crashed into him and he muttered an awkward "Heaven...", before even opening his eyes to see her in his arms. Now that, my lovelies, made me giggle. Not from the sexiness of it all, but from the rather inappropriate "Heaven..." line from our beautiful Edward. It was AWK-WARD.What made is so? You may ask. Well, let's just say if something crashes into you (even if you're a stoic, rock-hard, alabaster-abbed hot hot hotttt vampire), the first thing you would do is open you eyes. Right? Right. But no. He just HAD to mutter that awkward "Heaven..."

"Heaven....... smells like Bella. Maybe it is Bella. I don't know. Should I open my eyes and check? Maybe not."

For those who are currently gathering sharpened spears and lighting torches right now, thinking "Shut up, Maya! You don't understand because you haven't read the book! The book told him to say that!" I am telling you to shut up. First and foremost (warning: this may make you eager to slap my pretty little face) I have read the book, earlier than you did. Before Twilight hit the screens. Before they even intended to make Twilight, not New Moon, Twilight, into a film. I have read AT LEAST three times for each book. That's a quadriple million times than the times I've read my text books. Okay, pointy-nose-snob moment over. What I am trying to say is, inthe book, Edward smartly addresses his confusion, or illusion, over Bella's materialization in his arms. But Mr Pattinson isn't as smart. Sorry.

Moving on. Now, we focus on that timid, insecure, fragile little lady with the name of Isabella Marie Swan, or Bella. Or Bells. Or Edward's reason for living. For those who have read the books, you may know that Bella is a person with a VERY deep personality. She is complicated, even Edward thinks so. Even ARO thinks so. But I'm afraid that Kristen Stewart, portraying her in the movies, could not pull "Bella" off. She is a good actress, but being Bella is just not fitting. She might look like she would be a good Bella (oh yes yes) but sorry, her acting isn't deep. Her personality in the two films is as deep as the personality of a grain of sand. Especially in New Moon, where she was supposed to make our hearts bleed seeing her depression. I did not feel that depression. My heart did not bleed. She seemed like she was sick. Like she had asthma or something. The "hole in the heart" thing was not a success.

Even so, I would still like to give a clap to her and Robert Pattinson for trying their best. It wasn't their fault they couldn't pull it off. The Twilight Saga is a story with a very deep meaning of love. I understand that movie adaptations from novels are very very hard to do, because in novels, every word acts as an injection to our feelings and it controls our emotions. I call this The Jasper Effect. To Jasperize our emotions through a film is a highly complex process. A novel lifts up our souls and places them in the setting of a story. But through film, usually we just see and hear. Rarely do we feel. Especially a story so deep, so penetrating, so... so.... so Jasperizing.

The wolf pack saved this movie. I am not really a part of Team Jacob, but Taylor Lautner's drastic growth really did glued my eyes to his newly developed abs. Alex Meraz, who played Paul, was also a very good actor. The brotherhood bond shows through the Wolf Pack. I'm afraid I can't say the same for the Cullen coven.
"We're hot. We're really hot. Even Bella thought our little baby brother Jacob had a fever. Haha geddit? Hot? Fever? Haha. We are SUCH funny wolves!"

For me, Emmett, Jasper, Carlisle, Esme and Rosalie just died in this movie. Okay so there they are for one or two scenes. Then they disappear. Completely. In the novels, their presence are so there, are so real. But insignificant scenes are not put into the movie hence their dead characters (haha pun intended). It seemed like the Cullens, except for Alice and Edward, were not even in the movie. They were more like extras. Mike, Jessica, Angela and The Humans were more present than them, which wasn't supposed have happened.

"Hello, we are The Humans. We are more alive than the undead. In the movie AND the outside."

Overall, I think this movie was okay. Giving it 6.7 out of 10, it disappointed me a bit as I thought that with a change of directors, it will rise rapidly from Twilight's level. Though Chris Weitz managed to improve the effect and cinematography throughout the movie(effect rating: 8.6 out of 10), he could not grasp the true meaning of Twilight and The Edward Bella Love Phenomenon.

The soundtrack, though, it's a 9.
With Muse and Thom Yorke on the list, who could give less??

Oh really?

2009-12-01T12:21:00.002+08:00

I was browsing through literature notes...
and then......

Literature in English is an elective paper in the Sijil Pelajaran Malaysia (SPM). Although this subject is not popular among Malaysians, it is still very much in demand because Literature in English [2205/1] is one of the hardest papers there is in SPM.

Great.
NOW you tell me?

2009-11-26T18:27:00.002+08:00

It's that feeling of being under someone's hiking boots. That feeling when you feel like your ribcage is squeezing your heart and lungs thus leaving the view of your insides a bloody lumpy mess. That feeling when all you want to do is stick your finger through a fan with metal blades that's going on speed 5, then your whole body follows, so the view of you, or what used to be you, matches the view of your insides. That feeling where everything's awkward and you pretend that its not. But it is. You can't help it. Cz it is. It is it is.

I'm sorry.

A catch of air

2009-11-26T18:21:00.003+08:00

~~Bahasa Melayu~~

~~English~~

~~Sejarah~~

~~English for Science and Technology~~

~~Modern Mathematics~~

~~Pendidikan Islam~~

~~Additional Mathematics~~

Biology

Literature in English

Physics

Chemistry

7 down 4 more to go.

And not ready is a six feet understatement.

Cracking

2009-11-21T23:59:00.002+08:00

5 days ago...

Maya: Aaarghh Sejarah!

Victim: Alah relax je. Kalau ko tensyen ko rebus je buku Sejarah, minom. Kalau Math ngan Add Math rebos text book ngan calculator.

Maya: Bullshit! I dont know why everybody keep saying that! IT DIES NOT F***ING WORK! Text books are just paper and ink! PAPER AND INK!!!! Do you even KNOW what would happen if you eat air rebusan made from paper and INK???!! INK for god's sake! And rebus calculator??? Now that's just plain DUMB! It's just metal technological thingies inside there! I DONT WANT TO FREAKING DIE DURING SPM!!!!!!!!

Victim: Ummm.... okay....? Gurau je kot.

Maya: ..................

I'm cracking like an egg.

1095 days

2009-11-16T12:38:00.005+08:00

2006

2007

2008

2009
and loving every moment of it.
Happy Third Anniversary, Afiq. Thanks for all the wonderful times.
May we have 100 more anniversaries in the future.

We've grown up together, even if we're far from each other. We've gone through our teenage lives together, and I know it ain't over. There may be a few nails on the road, but they ain't sharp enough to pop our tires. Because we're strong, babe, and that is all that matters.

I love you. I love you. I love you.
I love you 1,000,000 times everyday, for one thousand and ninety five days. I will love you 1,000,000 times more for the 1,000,000,000,000 days to come, everyday.

Another emotional post that I feel like I need to post

2009-11-14T23:27:00.005+08:00

Sometimes when I look at other people's lives through technological mediums I wish that those technological mediums would just vanish so I wouldn't feel like I'm missing so much. Plus, it wouldn't feel so bad when you realize that people are ignoring you, because, without these technological mediums, you wouldn't know.

I don't know what's so hard about a simple Hello! Whatever happened to all the manners? Is being rude the new black now? With today's trends, it's really hard to keep up.

It's only acceptable to say Hi! to an old friend when you need something.
Eyh?

I don't know if anyone's gonna termakan cili after reading this but please, don't. Because you are only going to keep it to your self and prove my point. To those who termakan cili and actually took some initiative to let me know you're sorry, you are not the person I'm giving this cili to. You just termakan somebody else's cili.

No Kak Juria, this isn't about you sorry I was too emotional earlier. BFFs? :)

But this post is going to someone. Why am I not being terus terang? Because I'm just going to make things worse if I am. Won't I?

I don't know what I did, or what I said, but it isn't polite to ignore.

You are shredding someone's feelings. And you know this is about you but you are too ignorant to acknowledge my time of writing this because like I said, you are too ignorant.

Congratulations you just gained my "LOVE."

P/S:
If you've noticed my posts have been a little emotional and dark lately. So is my layout. I don't know why but I ain't feeling the love anymore. I remembered mentioning in my previous posts that Happy Maya is kindoff gone. If you don't like this Maya, too bad. She's not going anywhere. Yeah she laughs, she smiles, she even cracks stupid jokes once in a while. But she's not so rainbow and buttercups anymore.

If the word BLEAK comes to your mind, you might just be right.

I'm just tired of people's shit.

Of Troy Bolton, Hannah Montana and K Fed

2009-11-09T14:27:00.002+08:00

Okay lah kan I have a question to ask.
How many of you dislike High School Musical because you think you're too freaking cool for it? Because I got magical powers and I can see you guys from your monitors, most of you got your hands up (eventhough no one's actually reading this kan kan).

Well, I am NOT ashamed to admit that I AM ONE OF YOUUUU COMEEE OONNNNN HIGH SCHOOL MUSICAL IS SO FUCKIN LAME THEY CAN'T EVEN ACTTTTTTTT!!!

But Miley Cyrus rocks! I don't understand why most of you think she's an annoying Disney-fied slut. She can sing and dance and act. Okay so maybe she uses a little too much help from voice synthesizers in her songs but hey, which one of us haven't right? Her oh-so 'provocative' pictures doesn't even raise my eyebrow. What's wrong with that picture of her in a bikini? Isn't that normal? Doesn't everyone and their uncle wear bikinis to the pool? And that picture of her wearing short shorts, come on, that's so pathetic. Orang Melayu pon ramai pakai short shorts takde orang heran pon.

I kindoff respect her for standing up and being strong. She's a teenager. A hormonal horny teenager who wants to live her rich and famous life. Let her be. I don't think she's a bad influence (I read somewhere that a magazine's giving her the award for 'the worst celebrity influence') have you seen Lady Gaga lately? Don't you hear little girls singing "blablabla I wanna take a riode on your disco stick"? Why isn't she on the worst influence list?
I don't know why am I defending Miley since she doesn't even know me. But I like her. And her songs. And her brother. Ohh yess her brother.....

Moving on to the next celebrity on my "To Defend" list.

Britney Spears.
I don't know why everyone keeps pwning her. Leave Britney Alone!! I don't care if I sound like Chris Crocker but she's a strong woman and she should be a rolemodel to all of us! She went through HELL and came back as strong as ever. Yes she did some pretty stupid things but she's a celebrity it comes with the contract. Stop dissing Britney Spears! I loved her since I was 8 and I'm still loving her!

Now I'm getting emotional...

I've got to go.

We're all in this together blablablablablablalalalalalallablablabla dreams come trueeeeee...............................!!!

A fight with vulnerability.

2009-11-06T20:59:00.003+08:00

Most people think that I am a strong, tough girl just waiting for the wrong words to be spoken and BAMM there I go cutting people's throats. Usually, I am that kind of girl. But people I'm comfortable with know how vulnerable I am actually. Not people I'm close with, just those I'm comfortable with.

It's weird how my personality works. I don't have to be close to a person to feel comfortable with them. And people who I'm reeeaaally close with doesn't always make me feel comfortable. These people view me as the person I stated in the above paragraph. I may seem like a fighter. But I'm not. I hate fights, though you may see me seeking them often. But really, I hate fights.

The only logical way of explaining this is,
I don't like to fight. But when I'm in one, I fight hard. Since I just hate getting into one, being in one will take all of my energy out. Weird as it may seem, verbal fights usually get me exhausted. And, it also get me thinking. And making me emotional. Thus, I turn into the fragile person I said I am.

I don't know why am I posting this. It's just another Me post. My self-absorbency is getting OTT. Heh. But who cares because it's not like anyone is actually reading this.

To those who think I'm so strong; try to get to know me better.
To those who knows how vulnerable I am, and telling me I'm strong; thanks.

No, I'm not dying.
I'm just hungry.

The Stretch Phase

2009-11-05T16:52:00.002+08:00

It's kind off The Dark Ages for us unlucky Malaysian teenagers who were born in 1992. I like to call phases like this "The Stretch Phase." Why? Well for one thing, it's oddly sloooowwww like it's been stretched out, and we are supposed to fill in the sloooowwwneesssss by studying (which I am currently not doing) but more often than not, we, ehem, I mean I, choose to fill the slooowwwwnnnesss with the....... teng tedenggggggg......... INTERNET. Which is not really a smart choice but I do it anyways right?
Right.

Another reason why it's The Stretch Phase is because, hours before exam starts, you'd want it to end sooo quickly but again, time goes soooo slooowwwlllyyy........ But about 45 minutes before a paper starts, instead of going on sloooowwwlllyyyyyy, the time lapse suddenly increases and you'd want nothing but to stretch it out again so you could study study study and cram your head with things.

I find that I experience The Stretch Phase everytime there's a big exam going on.

But I never learn. hehehehehehehehe

It's sort of stupid really. I rreeeaaalllyyy want to get that JPA overseas scholarship, kalau lah dye ade bg utk TESL kan, I hope they do, but I don't work hard enough for it. Maybe I'm too laid back, maybe I'm just lazy. I don't know. But It's really hard for me to study Sejarah, Agama, Bio and other memorizing subjects awal-awal. Because I know me. If I started on Sejarah last month, and finish today, by the time the paper starts, I'll just forget everything.

Haih...

Oh shit.
I've turned into something I have always despised.

A Study Zombie.

All of my latest posts are somehow related to..... studying.....

noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo IM GOING TO END THIS NOW!

5...4...3...2...1. Die.

2009-10-30T13:18:00.004+08:00

It's 17 days until SPM.

For those who know me pretty well, I am not the girl who counts down the days of something she isn't looking forward to very much. I don't even count down the days to something I do look forward to. I am just not the type of person who counts things down. Because, counting involves numbers and numbers=math thus I die.

So why do I know that it's 17 days until SPM?

Well, mainly, because, everybody keeps saying it. Everybody keeps reminding me. Yesterday it was "gilee aahh lagi 18 hari doh." Also, it was said by a penceramah who came to gave us ceramah motivasi (and dare I remind you it had no effect on most of us because he was telling us things we have heard since we were 7?). "Kepada pelajar tingkatan 5, calon-calon SPM, lagi 18 hari je!"

And........? Your point is............? What do you expect us to say?
Grr I'm so scared, grr?
Or
OMGIMSOTENSEDRIGHTNOWINEEDTOSTUDYSOBAD?

And today, our kind... kind... Pn Vasanthi reminded us. "SPM lagi 17 hari."
Umm... okay....?

What's I'm trying to say is that why are we counting down the days? Is it possible, that that will save us from failing? It is possible, that counting down the days will make SPM go away? So maybe it puts pressure on us. But do we NEED any more pressure? I'll answer that. N-O. No. So whyyyy onnn eeaaarrrtthhh do we constantly need to be reminded that SPM is creeping up on our backs, sloooowwwlllyyy digging it's claws into our skin and bit by bit tearing up our internal organs???

I don't understand why do we have to pressurize eh-vuh-ree-thayng.

Instead, could you just kindly say "Jangan stress-stress, relax."
Takde lah orang blank mase prekse nanti because nak dpt those 67 A1's. Kan kan kan?

Haih humans and their obsession of being on top......................

Can YOU be the one who's making the effort?

2009-10-29T13:53:00.003+08:00

I'm tired of being the one who's chasing. I'm tired of hoping. I'm tired of believing. I'm tired of trying to save things. I'm tired of grasping. I'm tired of searching. I'm tired of squeezing all my effort out just to chase after you.

I'm tired.

I just want to be the one you chase after.
Sometimes.

Goodbye optimistic Maya.
Say hello to the meaner, bitchier Maya.

A life puzzle with no way out

2009-10-27T18:19:00.003+08:00

Awkward situations aren't really fun you know. It's a life puzzle, actually, that has no real solution to it. It isn't one of those "there are no right or wrong answers" type of puzzles. It has a right answer, and God forbids, a wrong one too. usually there's only one right answer to eleventy thousand wrong ones.

To find the right answer is like to find a straight-but-metrosexual guy in a gay bar. It's like trying to find the real Elvis in Vegas. It's like trying to find x, in math, without any clues or equations given.

And the worst part is, there is no time for trials and errors.
You just get ONE chance. If you do/say the right thing, chances are, it's gonna be fine. Do/say one of the jadizagillion wrong things you could do/say, you're gonna screw everything up pretty badly. And make things even more worse, and awkward. Which is something you might not want.

And there is absolutely no escape.

The only surefire way to avoid a wrong answer in an awkward situation is, to avoid them. Though not easy, almost impossible, it is your only chance of making out intact, fine, unharmed, and alive.
There is absolutely no connection with the picture but this post is getting too long.

Now you see me now you don't

2009-10-25T22:01:00.003+08:00

Do you know that feeling? Alaaaahh that feeling la. The one you get when you wish you could just disappear? Because your existence doesn't make the world a better place, and is often neglected. You know, when you feel like you're invisible? Like Harry Potter just lent you his cloak?

But Harry's lucky because eventhough he's under his cloak, some good wizards could still detect him. Lucky lucky boy he is.

I, on the other hand, am totally invisible. Even without the presence of any magical cloaks, or suits like in GI Joe that photographs everything behind you and puts them in front of you, I am undetectable, on occasions that I really want to be detected.

It's sad actually. I get really emotional thinking about it. Sometimes I think it's easier if I was to live in a Tag game. Then I'll know who's It and I'll stop feeling awkward.

Hm

Wargh stress stress

2009-10-25T16:09:00.003+08:00

I have been thinking... Oh no.

Okay, tengok ehh...

A few minutes before trials start......

I was laughing with some friends.
"Eh Maya, relax je kau."

So after the first paper, and before the second paper starts, I decided to buat muke serius.

Nobody tegur me or anything.

So my question is, actually,
why do we have to show how stressed we are before exams? I mean, why do we EVEN have to be stressed? Can it make our D into a B? Oh yessss... Then I'll be stressed like 24-7!

Another situation:

"Maya bile SPM?"

"18 November."

"Tak sampai 3 minggu lagi!"

"Relax ah. Lame lagi."

"Lame lagi?? Relax?? Mane bleh relax!"

-.-"

Then? Should I panic?

EEEIII MEMBOSANKANNYE KORANG NIIIIIIII!!!

The tale of a 3-year-old little girl with a mouth that beats her grandma's

2009-10-21T18:58:00.003+08:00

Heidi: Heidi nak udang cili!
Mummy: Udang cili takde...
Heidi: NAK!
Nenek: Okay-okay nenek masak...

*10 minutes after*

Nenek: Nah. Makan.
Atok: Mule-mule nenek masak udang taucu buat ape, kan nenek tau Heidi suka udang sambal?
Heidi: TAPI HEIDI NAK UDANG CILI, BUKAN UDANG SAMBALLL!!!

..............................

(one day at the pharmacy...)
Heidi: Mom... I want to be like Barbie.
Mummy: Okay ask Daddy. (hands her phone)
Heidi: (calling Daddy) Daaaadddd can I have yellow hair??

............................

Heidi: Look! It's Dad! It's a Man! It's DADMAN! It's DANNNNN.

...........................

(Lil' brother Noah kissed her.)
Heidi: EUUUWWWW BABY SALIVAA!!!!!

...........................

AuntieMaya: Heidi nak makan ayam goreng?
Heidi: No...
AuntieMaya: Heidi taknak makan ke?
Heidi: Heidi lapa...
AuntieMaya: Heidi nak makan ape?
Heidi: (points to ayam goreng)
AuntieMaya: Tadi cakap taknak.
Heidi: Nak Chicken.

............................

Heidi: Abang, it is impor'ant that you don't run in the restaurant because it is dangerous!
Daddy: So now there's a silent T in important?
Heidi: Yes.
Daddy: Wha'everr..
Heidi: It's whaTever Daddy.
Daddy: Wha'ever....
Heidi: Oh no not again...............

.............................

(Mummy was buying shoes for her)
Mummy: Heidi, beli kasot ni k?
Heidi: No mum. I want high heels!

there's too much until I can't recall anymore clearly.
In case your wondering, this is her:

The tiny one, of course.

Beyonce's concert postponed

2009-10-20T16:10:00.004+08:00

Bagos.
Lepas ni dah takde orang nak buat concert kat Malaysia dah kan? Avril Lavigne dulu pon kene hentam. Pussycat Dolls pon. AAR pon kene postpone. Black Eyed Peas pon kene hentam jugak.

Akon pon kene postpone, tapi last-last bg jugak.

Beyonce dipostponekan atas sebab 'provocative'. She agreed to abide the dress code. Katenye her songs and dance moves are provocative? "If you like her than you should have put a ring on it". Provocative? I don't think so.

Just because Akon's a guy, and dances like a monkey, and doesn't wear sexy clothing, you wouldn't think that his songs are provocative. Eh? ESPECIALLY if you haven't listened to any of them.

"I wanna LOVE you LOVE you all on the floor..."

"smack THAT, all on the floor..."

COME ON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Beyonce is as chaste as any Hollywood celebrity could be! I could only think of ONE provocative song. An OLD song. Naughty Girl. Tu je!

And SHE got postponed, and most probably CANCELED.

How about this prick?:

Huh??

To the people who decided that Beyonce is too 'provocative', STOP THINKING WITH YOUR KNEES AND USE YOUR HEAD!

Even if I'm not going (tade dueeeeettt), me, as a Malaysian, feels HUMILIATED. This story kelua kat Yahoo News and do you know how humiliated I felt when i read the comments??

You are stinking up Malaysia!!!

Hanging on a fishing line

2009-10-20T14:59:00.001+08:00

The world revolves with karma.
This doesn't necessarily means that when you do good you'll be rewarded vice versa and those kindoff things. I mean that karma is balance, right? It's about balancing. Duh. What I'm trying to say is, up must come down, left must go right, opened things need to be closed.

When you start things, and you want to end it, end it.
Don't leave things hanging.

Be it relationships, fights, friendship, a new project,
end the thing you started with a proper hanging.

I'm speaking on behalf of a friend.

Breaking up is bad.
Breaking up without a notable reason is worse.
Breaking up without a notable reason eventhough you have tried to get the notable reason for more than 5 times, while sacrificing your ego, is the worst.

Come on. What's so hard about putting and end to things? Don't be selfish.

Why exams are fun:

2009-10-15T21:39:00.003+08:00

Who said exams were boring?

I found this during my Biology gerak gempur:

Any of you notice anything weird?

??
....

...........
.........
.........

Okay you can LMAOZZZ now.

HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA

The word 'degree' made me shiver

2009-10-15T21:12:00.002+08:00

I'm getting a headache from thinking too much about universities.

I always, and forever, wanted to be a journalist. Well, I want to be an editor but you got to start somewhere. And the perfectest way for me to 'reach my dream' is to take journalism. And to take degree in journalism, the easiest route would be to take mass communications first. Tapi kat UiTM je ade.
Hm.
There's nothing wrong about UiTM, really. Friends tell me it's lotsa fun. But I'll be stuck with malays.

So my teacher told me to take TESL. I can be a journalist from this too. And TESL gots a wider job field.
So yeah.
TESL it is! As long as it doesn't involve too much numbers.

Then I checked UM for TESL and there's only degree in TESL offered at UM. Same as journalism. Most of Unis also the same jugak.
Asasi TESL, is only available in UiTM, ORRRR Universiti Darul Iman. Which is in Terengganu.
WTF I AM SO NOT GOING TO TERENGGANU.

So yeah.
I am confuzelled.
AAAAAAAARGHHH!!!

2009-10-14T23:13:00.001+08:00

Maybe I should consider taking TESL instead...

I LOVE FOOD

2009-10-13T19:19:00.003+08:00

My closest peeps know how much of a 'mengidam-er' I am. Even a pregnant lady doesn't crave like I do. You can go and ask my boyfriend, my sister, my parents, and my friends.

Pfftt.. No wonder that I'm a size UK300.

Hence, I am dedicating this post to my love of food.
Please, enjoy whatever pics I post, and please, deliver me some CZ I AM CRAVING THEMMM!!!

IKEA SWEDISH MEATBALLS. Ohmygod...........
IKEA poached salmon.
Seoul Garden grilled foods
Nasi Ayam Lemon Pak Li
Nasi Lemak Antarabangsa
Kerang Bakar
Ikan Bakar Melaka
Tom Yam yang AUTHENTIC giler
Yoshinoya beef rice
Takoyaki
Lamb Chops with mint sauce
Chicken wings madu Sabah
Nandos
Those Fish & Chips I had at the UK

Ohmygosh there are like a hundred thousand more food that I could think of right now. I WANT MY MEATBALLS!!!!!!!!!!!!

Uni and thingies

2009-10-13T18:54:00.002+08:00

Didn't go to school today, overslept. Mama didn't wake me up either, cz she thought I didn't want to go. And since trials are over, and PMR season is in, she didn't think that it was important for me to go to school.
Which is somehow true.
Lol.

And yeah, yesterday I paid for the UPU password thingy. Can't believe I'm actually gonna be in uni next year. It's totally overwhelming.
But I was kinda sad when I read the list of unis and their offered courses.

No choice but to go to UiTM.
There's nothing wrong with it, though. But I was aiming to go to UM. Turns out that UM only offers degree in journalism. So I have to get my MassCom diploma first in UiTM. Since I didn't notice any other universities that listed MassCom as one of their courses.

*sigh*

No Chinese and Indian friends for at least a year lah.

Tak best nye.

2009-10-11T17:32:00.001+08:00

I miss blogging
so
much.

But I don't have anything to blog about.

:(

Ketidakpuasan hati kini membuakbuak

2009-10-04T12:26:00.002+08:00

Okay. First of all.
I AM NOT CAPABLE OF USING RM68.17 in 10 days!

Why?
1- I get free calls to call Afiq. (which is the main reason for me to use my phone)
2. I get free texts to text Afiq.
3. I DO NOT text other people much.
4. I DO NOT call other people much.

So why... since 25/09/09 (sebab bill kelua 24/09/09), until today, 4/10/09, my unbilled charge amounts up to RM68.17?? Adakah free call selama 20 jam sebulan ku kepada si dia telah habis?
Na'ah. I don't think so. Because selalunya, he calls me. But his free calls are still there. AND. Since I checked my bill on the 2nd of October, (which was RM51 something), I did not text other people AT ALL. Except a few texts, which was less than 10! And I did not make a call to other people AT ALL. AT ALL. So whyyyy.... the heckkk..... does my bill increases as much as RM17 when I did not even use more than RM2?

And why the heck was the bill RM51 something in the first place?? I have been using this celcom postpaid line for a few months now and every month my bill maintains at RM56, give or take a few sen. Adakah sebab bulan lepas raya and I sent raya texts and open house invitations? If that's the reason, and because texts tu banyak sgt sampai tak termasok dlm last month punye bill, TAKKAN SAMPAI RM68 koootttttt.

Afiq said maybe I'm on the internet, accidentally. NOPE. checked, rechecked, and re-rechecked, repeated by 17 times.

I don't have THAT much money you know. And there's 20 days more before this month's bill comes out. If it keeps adding up like this, I'll die!

And God knows how much I hate customer service!!

help!

Education, lawyers, and 7 year olds.

2009-10-01T20:04:00.004+08:00

I've been thinking. And I think it's ironic to be thinking about what I thought about on my last year of school. Last 2 months of school, if you please. If you're wondering, which I doubt you would, I was thinking how obsessed Malaysians and Singaporeans are about education, and being on top.

I mean, where else in the world would you get a 7 year old going to tuition? And an 8 year old getting caned by parents because he or she doesn't get to be number 1 in class? And people obsessed with getting 5221718712 billion A1's for SPM?

Those things are just stupid, if you ask me.

Come on, get REAL. Where the heck is that Amalina chick who got 17A1's? Is she currently prime minister? Where the heck is that 21 A1's guy who I forgot his name? Is he doing something big right now? LIKE STOPPING ILLEGAL HUNTING OF ENDANGERED ANIMALS?

Well I guess not. Do ring me if you hear anything about them.

Being on top in class doesn't guarantee you a great LIFE.

Oh come on! Wake up and taste the shit! If you're in your room ALL DAY, STUH-DEE-ING, and not interacting with people, not having a social life, not having FRIENDS, would you think you'll survive in the REAL WORLD? The real world with high nosed people with a dagger behind their back? The real world with huge headed CEOs with a RM7billion suit and shoes to match?
In the real world, these types of people exist. Do you think your 34 A1's would save you from them?
Na'ah.
You need experience with people to handle them.
And spending 24 hours studying won't give you that.

A person with an average IQ but a GREAT personality will be ahead in life rather than an A1 IQ'd person with NO SOCIAL SKILLS AT ALL.

When you start working, it's not all exams and books.
It's all about interaction. WITH PEOPLE.

It's important to be concerned about education.
It's dangerous to be obsessed with it.

So please, give your 8 year old a break won't you? Rebellion will start to take place sooner or later.

And yeah, stop thinking that doctors, lawyers and engineers are the only successful peeps. Honour the writers, painters, musicians! They make your life LIVABLE. Not everyone is born a technical bitch. Some cherish creativity. Some need difference to make their lives better.

Raya news

2009-09-27T23:26:00.002+08:00

I just realized that I haven't been elaborating about my raya as much as everyone had. It's just that I haven't had any time to do so. Ever since the first of raya, saaaaammmpaaaiii skangggg, hectic gilaaaaaaaarzrzrzrzrz. Had the open house yesterday and yes, the only girl that showed up was Aifa. :) Best kan? Last year Najwa and Kak Juria.

The rest were all family and my sister's friends, my dad's friends. A whole lot of them.

AND OH!
I helped mama cook the laksa! Well, I kopek ikan je lah. But it was disgusting okay! Euw! But I did it. *pats self on the back*

But I was very happy cz Afiq showed up, with his friends. :) That made my day cz the lack of attendance from my friends kind off brought me down.

And it SOOOOOOOO didn't help that 3 hours before the thing started, me and my sister went to the salon to get our hair done. Okay cuci rambot RM18, set rambut RM25. SET RAMBUT WAS A TOTAL WASTE. The hairdresser curled my hair, told her my hair was stubborn and it won't stay curly very long, she put and extra dose of hairspray and sed "ini bole tahan sampai malam maa" lutot ko. I balik, tolong angkat2 benda, siap2 tuka baju, and TA-DAH! My hair was half-way straight! So what did I do? Take my curling tongs and recurl. FOR FREE. Damn you. ANDDDDD I told her not to cut my fringe cz I like it long and when it covers my eyes, cz I feel mysterious and sexy (heheheheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee), but noooooo, she HAD to cut it jugak. "Panjang sgt la Miss. I kasi tolong you potong sikit saja." Kasi tolong ye kak? RM5 ko caj aku. For a 2 cm cut of the fringe! AND you ruined the whole look! Now It's short and just a tad over my eyes! I LOOK STUPID AND ROUND. Like a ball! Even a ball doesn't look STUPID and round! A ball just looks round! OKAY??!!!

Okay.
Afiqafiqafiqafiq....

My tantrum is out.

Oh. Unfinished business:
MY BAJU PUNYA LENGAN WAS HUUUUGGGGEEE AND IT MADE MY GIGANTUOUS ARMS LOOK BIGGER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.

Oh, I nak glamkan sket keadaan by posting a picture:

BYE!

A happy woman.

2009-09-23T14:50:00.002+08:00

This is to add to Khalid's list of how to please women.

55. Kalau dia merajuk, pujuk walaupun dia cakap "takde pape".

56. Even if dia marah kalau u pujuk, pujuk juga. Walaupun dia mengamuk.

57. Kalau dia merajuk sebab u pujuk walaupun dia cakap jangan, terus memujuk.

58. Kalau dia suka pakai kasut tinggi, dan mengadu kaki sakit, ckp dgn lembut supaya dia kurangkan pakai kasut tinggi, sebab u taknak dia sakit.

59. Kalau dia kata "sukati I la! Hidup I!", jgn sesekali cakap "Habis lepastu mengeluh pulak!" Instead, cakap, "I taknak u sakit..."

60. Be protective, contohnya kalau ada orang mengusha dia, hold her closer. Tapi jgn terlalu protective.

61. Kalau birthday dia u taktau nak bg apa, bg kasut atau beg. Walaupun u tau dia ada kasut dan beg yg sgt banyak. Trust me, dia takkan ckp "Alaaa... kasut/beg lagi!"

62. Jangan tanya saiz kasut dia. Anda akan dimarahi kalau salah saiz, tapi siapa suruh tak notice awal-awal!

63. Dia gemuk mcm mana pon (macam I) jangan beli baju lebih dari saiz UK12. Nak mati? It's better kalau baju tersebut terlalu kecil dan dia tak muat drpd bersaiz UK18 tetapi muat.

64. Kalau dia tanya "Rambut I okay tak?" Dia hendakkan jawapan yg jujur.

65. Kalau dia tanya "Outfit I okay tak?" Cakap "okay!." Sebab rambut boleh dibetulkan di mana-mana, outfit tidak.

66. Kalau dia cair terhadap mana-mana celebrity lelaki, jgn sesekali ckp "Mamat tu gay."

67. Jangan cair terhadap mana-mana celebrity wanita.

68. Kalau dia pandang seorang gadis hot, dan berkata kepada u, "Hot gile minah tu." Jangan iyakan, ataupun menidakkan (sebab obvious gila gadis tu hot), instead, cakap "Memang hot. But she's not you."

69. Mengejek teman wanita anda pendek itu tidak apa, tetapi bukan bukan bukan bukaaaannn gemuk. Dia tidak akan sakit hati, tetapi menyeksa diri sendiri untuk kurus.

70. Hadiah mahal memang best, tetapi jangan terlampau selalu membanjirinya dengan hadiah-hadiah mahal, nanti dia akan rasa bersalah. Tetapi jangan pula tidak pernah memberinya hadiah mahal.

Sebenarnya memang senang nak gembirakan wanita :)

Di hari raya...

2009-09-22T13:18:00.002+08:00

I got back from Ipoh yesterday night. And raya there was okay.It was the usual. But fun nonetheless. SEBAB DPT DUIT RAYA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Hehehheeheheeeeee...

I lost my flipflops. Thank god ada kasut raya yang sakit nak mati. I will never get used to being a proper lady! The night of the first day of raya sumorang balik umah Opah. Well, almost sumorang lah that is.

But what I deduce about this year's raya is that it's not as fun as it was when I was still 20kgs. Which was, a veeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeerryyyy long time ago. I wanted to post pictures tapi tak upload lg. So this is just a simple update about my raya, not that anyone wants to know...

So yeah, the Dad said open house Sabtu ni, petang. Siape-siape nak dtg, contact me okay. Sukati lah Myspace ke, Facebook ke,phone ke, chatbox ni ke.Just give me a holla.

Selamat Hari Raya!!

Rayarzrzrzrz

2009-09-19T19:33:00.001+08:00

I am on my way to Perak. Singgah buka jap kat Petaling Jaya so I'm here at Jaya One complex. I don't really know what's the function of this bulding since it's not a mall but it has like LOADS of tempat makan. I ate at YTappers just now but now I'm at Old Town. My sister's meeting her friend so yeah... come here pretty hot chocolate.

It's raining so heavily since 5 something. I hate the rain when I'm wearing jeans. Ugh.

So I don't really know what to blog about right now but I feel like blogging so yeah. This is just another pointless post. If you're reading this, you are wasting your time MUAHAHAHHAHAHAHA.

So tell me, are prepared for raya tmrw? What is the colour of ur baju raya? Where are you going to balik kampung? And most importantly, how much duit raya are you going to give me?

Jeng jeng jengggg...

Now that my mumbling is over,I would like to take this oppurtunity to wish every one of you a very Happy Eid Mubarak. Or Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitriiiii!!!!!!! Kirim sket kueh mueh dan juge wang Raya. Jemput lee dtg umah ek.
Maaf zahir batin :)

Stuff and more stuff

2009-09-18T12:25:00.004+08:00

Guess what guess what! My internet's okay! Yeaaaayyyy!!
I miss yew bloggie woggie. I miss yew Facebook. I miss yew Myspace.

So some stories that I didn't get to blog about right away when it happened:

Got food poisoning, fever, etc etc.
Was admitted in the hospital for suspected case of appendicitis. Stayed one night, then lied of not having any pain at all because the hospital was just TERRIBLE.
So I got discharged the next day hehe.
Trials suck.
They truly did. Furckitty Furck.
On Friday, I was really pissed off with RCO.
Surprisingly, Physics was loads easier than Chemistry, which I am so gona flunk.
A few days after I got out of the hospital, at last I got to berbuka with Afiq, and my sister.
And some other stories that I absolutely can't recall and even if I could, I don't have the mood to blog about it right now.
Oh, another one, in the last two weeks, I have about 5478270428942 thousand hours of sleep dept. I SERIOUSLY NEED TO CATCH UP ON MY SLEEP.

!!!!

2009-09-17T11:06:00.003+08:00

Has it been 2 weeks? 3 weeks?
I forgot. The modem's busted...
AGAIN.
Been waiting for the technician to come for ages now but no one in a Streamyx shirt came.
Ironically, my non-internet weeks had been full of stories that I would just LOVE to blog about when it happened. I would even love to blog about it right now but I can't bcz I'm at school and I'm on the net cz Imran brought hid laptop and broadband.

Thank goodness.

And I just know yang bila nanti internet dah ok kat umah mesti aku dah takde mood nak blog pasal bende bende jadah tu.

haih.

Let me just say a few things...
My birthday was dead boring. Apart from dinner at Seoul Garden which was AWEZOOMMMMESZSZSZSSZSZSZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm still waiting for presents hehe. Anyone? Anyone?

I need to get off the net right now. People are queuing to get on.

So..........
Oh wait. I was just going to end this but Imran told me to mention the quees' names:
Imran Dolah Daos Issa Syafiq Ammar Faiz Hafizs.
Nak glemer nye pasal.

So yeah. That's all for now. So until my modem's alrite...

SELAMAT UPCOMING HARI RAYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAZZZ!!!!!

Berlalulah sudahhh bulan sebelum Ramadhan...

2009-08-25T12:52:00.003+08:00

Ahhh... Ramadhan...
No drinking icy sirap bandung during the day
No eating crispy toasted Butterscotch toast
No sneaking into the room to have a great 'digging expedition' .... (okay that was a little bit disgusting. YOU tell ME you never picked ur nose!!)

Talking about Butterscotch toast, a few days ago, me and my sister we went to Petronas. Then I was like "Shit Butterscotch dah habis." So I went into the kedai Mesraaaa~ to buy those little pieces of heaven. The dude at the counter scanned the bread, I mean the bread's barcode, and do you know what popped up on the register?

Teke lahhh

Teke laa!!!

Okay fine, I'll tell you,

This is going to be like supah-funneyh. You'll laugh like hell!!!!!!

Okay.... It.... was.....

DELICIA BUTT

HWAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAH WTF DELICIA BUTT???!!!!! Geddit?? Butt?? As in ass?? Bootayh??

Okay fine maybe it isn't so funny. But it did seem funny then... To me... anyways.... Because my sister didn't laugh either. Sheesshh people and their no-sense-of-humour.

Okay that story wasn't my initial purpose of posting this post. I forgot what was.... I got distracted... Hey! Blogging on an empty stomach shortens my attention span by 60% okay? And I don't even have much to begin with.

Oh I remember now.

This post is to say HAPPY FASTING to all those muslims out there! Remember, no drinketh water, no feasteth wonderfule foode, no pickieth thy noses.

And guys, no porn.

Hehe

You know what's so hard about fasting? For me, it's not the hunger. I can bear with that. It's the boredom. And the suffering you get from waiting. I guess that's God's test to us. He knows what's best. And yeah, my tummy needs resting. It REALLY needs resting. And I could do with less kgs.

:)

A birthday present

2009-08-22T15:25:00.003+08:00

On August the 19th, my big brother turned 33. Hence, it was his 33rd birthday. He was officially 33 years old on that day. But because we did not get to meet him on that day, and also the next day, me and my sister went to KLCC, where he worked, yesterday, which is a Friday, two days after his actual birthday, to deliver a cake we baked for him.

It was a moist chocolate-almond cake with strawberry fairy icing.
Why fairy?
This was why:
And yes, you did not read wrong. It was my big BROTHER'S THIRTY-THIRD birthday. And we baked fairy cake :) Mind you, this was handmade. My sister did the drawing on the cake. I made the icing. We both made the cake. With help from our little cousin, Fifa.

And, because we didn't have a box to put the cake in, my sister made this:

This was a Secret Recipe paper bag. You know, the huge one you put Secret Recipe cakes in? Yeah, that one. She transformed it into a cake box. Cool eh? And I put the finishing touch on, PINK AND WHITE RIBBONZZZ!!!

His friends saw the cake when he opened it.
OMG YEAYYYY!!!!!

We are 2 veeeeeeerrryyy sweet sisters aren't we?
xDDDD

Gemini

2009-08-17T20:09:00.004+08:00

My sister's hooooooooooooooommee!!!

And there are TWO expressions and/or emotions to this post:

YEAYYOMG.

and/or

OHSHITNO.

Based on my research (pppffffffftttttt), my sister is a Gemini, being someone who has two personalities. Thus, she's giving me some Gemini aura here as we're sharing the same house and internet. The stated aura will confuse me into to choices hence, this post.

Truth being told

2009-08-15T16:56:00.002+08:00

I MISS YOU.

Truth being told

I'm AWESOME GIRL.

Fire and vomit

2009-08-13T17:05:00.004+08:00

I feel sorry for my boyfriend during a certain time of the month. My PMS is sooo badd that people may mistake me for being pregnant.

Don't believe me?

I would cry over an argument of chocolate is better than vanilla. (btw VANILLA RAWKX)
I would yell (to the bed) over hitting my toe on the bed.

This may sound cliche, pfftt blame in on the hormones but if you want to see what a typical textbook PMSing lady seems like in real life, be my guest. Literally.

Okay I'll make this easy for you:

This is me PMS negative:

(The one on the left)

And this is me PMS positive:

(I'm breathing fire, not throwing up)

The first picture shows me when I'm normal. Lovely, sweet, adorable, sexxaayy, hott, pretty, nice, kind-hearted, and such. The picture says it all. The second picture... well, lets just say you don't want to be the ultra-tan guy I'm holding, okay?

So the point is, Pokemons do exist. This can be proven by, well, ME. I evolve into a Sexy Godzilla during a certain time of the month. Unlike most Pokemons, my evolution is not permanent. I am sort of like...... a werewolf. But... not really. But sort off. So to those skeptics who are still denying the existance of Pokemons, you need a tanning bed. Or get a spray tan, a really dark one, like Ross. Look at my second picture and you will surely understand why because Pokemons do, in fact, ROAM THE EARTH I KNOW BECAUSE I HAVE GOLDEENS IN MY FISH PONDS AND SOMETIMES LUGIAS FLY OVER MY ROOFTOPS AND I AM HAPPY WITH THAT.

Thank you for your time.

My take on Love:

2009-08-09T22:35:00.002+08:00

Love is when

you don't treat your other half as Your Other Half, but a whole other human being with emotions and a life to live.
Just Like You.

That's how you know when you're really in love.

This is just for the sake of your attention

2009-08-06T22:58:00.003+08:00

The doctor said I have Postural Hypertension.

Don't worry, it's not as serious as it sounds. Bunyik cam nak mati je kan? :p
It means my blood pressure's difference when I'm sitting, lying down, or standing is kinda big. It also means it takes a long time for my blood to get somewhere suddenly. That's why when I'm standing and I pick something that I dropped and as soon as I stand back up again, the world spins like Roda Impian.

I think it's cool. I have Postural Hypertension. WOAH.
This is sooooooo great for gettiing attention yeay!

And the doctor also said that I'm a tad stressed.
Really? I haven't noticed lol.

Doc: "Ade gadoh-gadoh dgn kwn ke?"

Me: "Aaaaaaaaaa takde lah. Cam budak-budak."

Lmao.

See, bitch. YOU ARE CAUSING MY HEAD TO ACHE AND I HAVE TO MISS SCHOOL BECAUSE OF YOU.

Dumbass.

MATURITY AND WHAT IT IS

2009-08-01T21:48:00.003+08:00

To the oversized children out there:
Maturity is not about being serious and laughing less. It's not about decreasing happy-time. It's not about tsk-tsking and shaking your head at the sight of people having fun. It's not about BEING A HYPOCRITE.

Maturity is about being wise and considerate to those around you. Maturity is not about acting like an adult. It's about knowing how to be matured. Adults are not always matured. Even if they think they are.

To those who disagree, I DON'T CARE.

The thing is, being overly sensitive about something as silly as A JOKE is NOT matured.

Look who's talking.

Yes I can be over sensitive too. But you don't hear me going around spreading stories, gathering a gang of 200 people and making the person's life miserable as miserable goes, don't you?? And do you hear me screaming at people to "GROW UP?"

When something's settled,
IT'S SETTLED.
If it's not, FUCKING SETTLE IT.

Do not, I repeat, DO NOT drag other people in. YOU ARE MAKING A MESS.

And you don't have the guts to clean it up.

Come on people, let's vote.
Who here thinks verbal fighting's for three-year-olds?
And boleh plak "Aku taknak kwn ko dah." Apasal tak "kawan tipu-tipu" je like when you're 9 or 10? When I put it like this, now do you understand that you are just being freaking silly? Or do you need me to squirt a water gun loaded with minyak cap kapak in your eyes? Or preferably brain??

Gosh...
I could really use some ice cream right now.

Oh my. Why can't you exist in Malaysia....

The truth is, you are still a kid inside. Blowing bubbles in the class isn't childish. Fighting over silly things are.
And you are making a big deal out of it. Seriously, Miss, I REALLY HOPE YOU READ THIS ACCIDENTALLY. Because I know, people like you can't be told straight to the face. Karang you tell everyone the pusing-pusing punya story pulak. So yes, I reeeeaaallllyyy hope you accidentally read this.

Fagg0t.

This is a story I wrote for the

2009-07-27T20:24:00.003+08:00

Majalah Sekolah.
I don't like selokas. They are boring.
So this was submitted instead:

Al-kisah 5 Science 2009 yang Separa Benar.

Pada suatu hari, seorang ratu bernama Ratu Vasanthi Mawar Sebatang dari kerajaan Mesapotamia sedang berjalan-jalan di dalam hutan dan terjumpa bendahara negaranya, seorang bendaraha yang berwibawa yang telah bertugas selama 5 tahun bernama Tun Reza. Tun Reza sedang berbincang tentang masalah Negara bersama-sama dengan setiausaha beliau, Dang Shamimi Gebu Salju sambil memesan “The tarik satuuuuuuu……!!” kepada Chef istana, Afiq. Sedang ratu berjalan, baginda terserempak dengan beberapa orang puteri dari negara China. Bukannya Puteri Hang Li Po, tetapi Permaisuri Mei Zi, dan puteri-puteri baginda bernama Puteri Pei Ying, Puteri Chiau Yin, Puteri Shin Yeng, Puteri Yardley, Puteri Poh Lin dan juga suami baginda, Raja Soo Lee yang sentiasa kelihatan mengantuk.

Cerita kini fokus kepada Puteri Shin Yeng yang mabuk cinta dengan kumpulan pop terkemuka, VSLC Duo yang dianggotai oleh Michael Jin Hoong dan Elvis Shen Wei. Kumpulan tersebut mengundang gitaris jemputan, Muizz Gates untuk konserto terakhir mereka di Hulu Langat. Cik Sofea, manager duo tersebut merupakan seorang yang tersangatlah garang tetapi peramah. Adik Cik Sofea, Alia, telah mengahwini anak Ratu Vasanthi, Putera Issa Majamasam yang sangat tinggi……. darjatnya. Kini, Alia bergelar Tuan Puteri Alia Penyeri Diri. Ketua dayang Tuan Puteri, Sri Najwa Ani, sebenarnya bercita-cita menjadi seorang marine biologist untuk mengkaji dugong-dugong yang hampir pupus tetapi cita-cita beliau telah dirampas oleh kakaknya, Sri Anis. Suatu hari, Sri Anis telah diculik oleh Raksasa Jambu Ammar yang menggunakan kuasa cermin sakti untuk menculik tetapi berjaya dihalang oleh SuperHendriErman atau lebih dikenali sebagai Superhenderman, super hero kerajaan Mesapotamia. Tiba-tiba, lagu nasyid yang indah berkumandang. Suara merdu imam istana, Ustaz Dolah yang ligat berduet dengan Ustaz Al-Firdaus yang agak unik orangnya telah membantu Superhenderman mengalahkan raksasa dan menyelamatkan Sri Anis.

Tunang Sri Anis, Professor Adib Q juga merupakan seorang saintis dan telah berjaya menemui manusia spisis baru dari negara BTHO yang diberi nama Faiz atau nama saintifiknya Ahmadfaizyahya. Prof. Adib Q juga telah berjaya mengubati penyakit milik bangsawan terkenal, Sir Adha Conan Doyle, iaitu penyakit Gaggapus Sangatkus, ataupun gagap. Sir Adha mempunyai 3 orang isteri bernama Madam Wardah, Madam Shakila dan Madam Noli yang pendiam tetapi baik hati. Niat hati Sir Adha ingin memasang lagi satu, seorang gadis dari La Paz yang bernama Jannah (disebut Hannah). Jodoh mereka tidak menjadi kerana Jannah telah dipinang oleh Dato’ Syafiq yang diam-diam ubi berisi. Sikap luaran Dato’ yang ‘cool’ dan ‘macho ‘ telah membolehkan beliau mempunyai 2 orang isteri selai Jannah iaitu Datin Rafidah dan Datin Aifa. Walaupun bermadu, kedua-dua orang datin ini sangat berbeza. Datin Rafidah sangat pendiam dan merupakan seorang suri rumah manakala Datin Aifa sangat kepoh dan bekerja sebagai DJ Radio.

Kembali kepada cerita Ratu Vasanthi, sedang baginda menjamah kudapan yang enak-enak seperti Ribeye Steak dan pasta Fettuccini Formagio yang dibelanja oleh Sir Imran Rom’, seorang bangsawan dari negara jiran. Tiba-tiba, anak saudara ratu, Hang Hafizs, meluru masuk dan bertanya, “Where is The Pearl???!” Ratu Vasanthi menyuruh personal assistantnya, Dang Athirah menyeru polis istana untuk mencari The Pearl yang dimaksudkan. Rupa-rupanya, putera kedua baginda, Putera Amierul Paramesyuarat telah mengambil mutiara tersebut dan membuat gigi palsu daripadanya untuk memikat puteri negara seberang laut, Princess Shobana Mon Cherie. Masalah pun selesai. Segala kejadian adalah ‘benar’ dan cerita ini dilaporkan oleh Cik Puan Seri Professor Doctor Maya.

Classmates are bolded. Except the first one, class teacher.
Enjoy this lame result of boredom.